I have delt with an eating disorder and it is ruining my life...?

i have had an ED (eating disorder) for a little over a year. we do not know what triggered it but it is bad. i am not deathly thin but i do think i am fta when i am told i look good. i am told i am tiny, little and athelitic looking but all i see is fat fat fat and when i eat i get SO guilty i throw up. my family knows about it. i slit my wrist last summer because i thought i was too fat and i almost died. i was in a phyc ward for a week. i am told by EVERYONE...my bf, my therapist and all my family members that i am not fat but i STILL think i am...has anyone delt with this before? how can i get better? i am CONSTANTLY trying to cut out on food and lose weight and it is an obsession! i do have ocd and its tied in with the bulimia and distorted image....HOW CAN I GET BETTER AND BELIEVE WHAT EVERYONE SAYS???

well ya know it has to do alot with self esteem so the best thing you can do is go to phsycologist i thought the same thing about myself and well all my friends would say the same but the thing is you have to meditate on how you really look and the thing is get used to how you are if you do feel your fat think
does the media influence my thinking and my body image?

also i think you should know that before fat people were thought of as beutiful so just relax and if your fat wel then who cares no one should influence your way of thinking or how you should look at yourself
good luck and dont worry your fine the way you are

i had ocd and annorexic, what i did as tried looking at other people, and when i saw someone who looked fat, i then looked at myself. I knew then that i was definately to skinny. If this does nto work, try going to a rehab center, my sister had this problem and went to one and she is now healthy and happy

Find something that you enjoy having like time on the computer or tv, tell your parents that you arent allowed to watch or play or whatever it is that you enjoy until you have eaten a meal, u are only aloud to do the thing that you like after you have eaten, if you havnt eaten then you dont get the reward, your brain soon relates eating with the reward and you want to eat so that you can play or or watch.
Wear tight fitting clothes so that you can see your body shape, everytime you look in the miror say, i am beautiful and i love myself.

I have the same thing.
It helps to not pay attention to celebrities (if you do that is) because Hollywood is plastic anyways.
Pick a sport you love or a hobby to keep yourself busy.
Try to focus on a goal and work towards it (losing weight not being a goal).

That's what I've been told. But it is tough. It's still in the back of my mind..everyday.

And what I realized is...whether you believe others or not..what's important and matters is that you believe yourself. Then you'll be able to believe others.
Try seeking some professional help if you can. Ask your family doctor.

Definitely keep up with your therapy. What is the worst thing that would happen if you WERE fat? You know you're not. Keep reminding yourself that you want to be healthy, you know your perceptions are false.