In this situation, what would you do concerning valve replacement?

My dad has been in the hospital for a week. He had a stroke, he has a mechanical valve that's been in there for 5 years.

Until yesterday he had responses on his right side and could squeeze your hand but couldnt talk. He is on a ventilator bc he can't breathe on his own (ppl are on ventilators for wks right? and they come out of it?) and today they had to put a tube in one of his intestines to suck out stuff bc it wasn't passing.

3 options:
Have the valve replaced. 1 Dr doesnt want to do it (neurologist), the other 2 Drs don't know yet. At any time, and during the surgery especially.. the infected valve could break off again and go to head causing another stroke. He also isn't that strong.

OR: put a trach in him but then they couldn't do the surgery which would be high risk of another infection and could be fatal as well.

OR: take him off the ventilator which would be fatal. The nurse said the Drs will do whatever we want since we know what my dad would want.

My dad is 40 y/o. I'm 21 and dealing w/this.

I sympathize with you and your dad.
If your dad had a severe stroke that has made it impossible for him to breath on his own and to impair his ability to handle his secretions in the gut, then I dont see a point of his having major cardiac surgery. If he has a mechanical valve, then he probably is on blood thinners right now. They will have to stop blood thinners before doing any surgery.
Talk to the doctors and try to get an impression about what they think his chances of recovery are. Not just being taken of the ventilator but also regaining cognition. Doctors can usually tell if u press them hard, otherwisethey are reluctant to givebad news. Also get a trach in him as it will ease the load on his lungs and also prevent the risk of infections from an endotracheal tube.

I wouldn't want to give up. I would try the valve replacement.

I'm sorry - I don't have an answer for you - I think it's a family decision.

I did just want to say I'm sorry you are going through this and I hope everything works out.

I am really sorry to hear this, but it sounds like your Dad is a very sick man.

if he does not make it, your Mom will need you there, you WILL cope, take it one day at a time.

every extra day is a bonus

Blessings to you and your family for the heart ache you are going through. If it were my family, I would need to talk with the Doctors, the Surgeons and find out what they feel his long term prognosis is and what it can be with surgery. I would take into account how your father feels about it and what he would want done. It seems they would not operate until he is in a stable condition. You did not mention what kind of stroke he had or how long ago, I say this because people make remarkable come backs after strokes with therapy. You need to talk with the doctors and not only the nurses. In fact, his doctors should be talking with your family. Then hold a family meeting. There is nothing ever wrong with a second opinion either from different doctors. If you are sure you know what your father would want, follow his wishes. I will say prayers and wish you all the best.

First, I'd find a way to communicate with my dad to see what he wants. I would encourage my dad to find out why the one doctor doesn't want to do it, and maybe find another doctor who has the intelligence to not sit on the fence. This is YOUR dad. You want him around for a few more years, to love on him and allow him to enjoy life to its fullest. I wished I had done something sooner in regards to my own dad. He might be here right now if I had pushed him sooner to go to the doctor. At any rate, I would push this doctor to get committed to saving my dad's life, no matter what. If he still passes on, at least you'll know that you've done all you can. With surgery, he at least has a better chance at coming out of it, even if that's a small chance. It's better than the other two options, which don't sound like any options I'd consider. Getting another opinion is a good thing. You might find a doctor who isn't afraid of doing everything possible to give someone back their life. After all, today's medicine is so much more advanced than before. You would think that there'd be more they could do. See if you can find a specialist in this field who would be able to tell you if your doctor is correct, and what else could be done. My mom had an old saying, "If I'd have known I was going to fall down, I'd have sat down first". Hindsight is better than foresight. I wouldn't want you looking back and wishing you would have done more, like I've done. You're 21, and you deserve to have your dad with you for as long as God allows. God does work through medicine and doctors. Why? Because it pleases Him to do so. Okay, enough said. Hope all works out for you & your family. <*)))><