Looking for more ways to treat Vaginismus?

I am looking for some serious answers. This is a emotionally painful and embarrassing issue enough for me to share, I really don't need the wise comments.

I would like to hear from both women who have had to deal with this issue (or friends of women) and men whose partners have had this issue. For the men, share some advice on how you got through it emotionally, ways you gave support, and things you did to aid in your partner's healing.

I have a diagnosis for vaginismus related to Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (also diagnosed) and I am undergoing intensive therapy to help change my belief system around sex. I am going to get those graduated dialators from vaginismus.com next week.

My fiance and I have tried inserting finger, and sometimes it works but with a lot of burning. It never works with a vibrater. We've been trying for about 3 years; I started seeing a therapist about a year and a half ago on this issue.

Will add additional details momentarily...

As far as OBGYN exams, internal ones are out of the question. My attitude is-if they want to do one, they'll do it over my dead body. Really.

I'd like to hear about additional things to help aid my healing. I know it will take time.

Thank you.

Hi,

I'm very sorry that you have this condition. I know how incredibly frustrating it can be.

Fortunately for you, there are several online support groups that you can join. Start with primaryvaginismus in yahoo groups. Those women are sufferers themselves, so they will be able to relate and give you support and encouragement. Men don't really do as well with "support groups" per se, but often those women will connect their men with eachother. My husband had one that he chatted with regularly.

The dilators will be a BIG help - but you will have to be very proactive in this therapy. A word of caution (this includes fingers...) use LOTS of lubricant. The burning sensation can be relieved by you "bearing down" while something is being pushed forward. (This means that you push your muscle as though you were having a bowel movement...sorry) Also, breathe out through your mouth as you are doing this. Take it slow in the beginning and once something is all the way in, just leave it there (no movement), and relax your whole body, getting used to the sensation.

Best of luck to you.

P.S. Don't let anyone suggest surgery... that will only make it worse, and prolong your recovery. Trust me on that one.

It is a serious problem and no one seems to know how to deal with it or advise you, nor will I (I am a woman) I think a therapist is a great idea and a loving fiance who is patient is good for starting. I wonder, if you insert your own finger does it hurt too? What about lots of lubrication? What about using some herbal drops to ease the tension, have you ever heard of Rescue Remedy ? This is a wonderful herbal remedy for anxiety, when my morning starts and I feel like a nervous wreck I take 4 drops and I am as good as new.

I am giving you a huge page about vaginismus maybe you will learn something new? In any case good luck to you
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&rls=c...