Is there an easy was to overcome vaginismus? I feel like I have tried everything?

I have been married for over 2 years, and we have not consumated our marriage. I have been told i have vaginismus. Is there anyone out there that has gone thorugh this horrible disorder? If so, can someone give me some insight. I have tried counseling and everything. Its ruining my marriage.I would appreciate any help at all!!

I'm very sorry that you have vaginismus. I wish I had an easy answer for you, but unfortunately, there isn't one.

I suffered with vaginismus for over 9 years in my marriage, and believe me, I tried EVERYTHING to get rid of it. I had surgery, dysfunction therapy, 7 doctors, marriage counselling, porn, muscle relaxants, I tried getting drunk, I had a baby (they say a vaginal birth can help - I had a caesarian), I tried crying, screaming, cursing...

Finally, what got me through it was dilators - a vaganismic woman's best friend. But even so - that took collosal effort. You've read that vaginismus is psychological - well, try getting that dilator in the first time.

There's also a group on yahoo that you can join and get support which wasn't available for me.

I wish you the best of luck. Know that there is hope for the end of the disorder.

Vaginismus is a psychological disorder in response to fear of sexual intercourse for whatever reason. This fear may be subconcious. Developing a healthy, nurturing relationship with your partner over a long period of time will eventually resolve this issue. The key is to have a partner that is willing to take things slowly and make you as comfortable as possible. Perhaps seeing a psychiatrist will help you deal with this issue.

Instead of sexual intercourse, try other forms of intimacy, such as oral sex or mutual masturbation. This will foster a comfortable and trusting sexual relationship and help you get over any phobias or self-conciousness that you may have. Make sure that you problem is truly psychological and is not related to the size of the vaginal introitus (opening) or any other medical conditions. There are also vaginal dilators that are available to help introduce gradually larger objects.

I hear ya. I have it too. Go to www.vaginismus.com. I haven't tried the program there, but it's worth a shot. Good luck!!

(I've heard there's a surgery that you can get, but I'm not so sure about that since it's more of a psychological disorder. Try visiting a psychiatrist.)

The treatment of choice with vaginismus is an extensive therapy program that combines education and counseling with behavioral exercises. Exercises include pelvic floor muscle contraction and relaxation (Kegel exercises) to improve voluntary control.
Vaginal dilation exercises are recommended using plastic dilators. This should be done under the direction of a sex therapist or other health care provider and treatment should involve the partner. This treatment should gradually include more intimate contact, ultimately resulting in intercourse.
Educational treatment, including information about sexual anatomy, physiology, the sexual response cycle, and common myths about sex, should be provided as well. When treated by a specialist in sex therapy, success rates are generally very high.
The poster below me mentions douching- do not use douching- they are not recommended anymore as not only can a douche disrupt the normal balance of your body, but make you more open for infection.

ya, try tokeep you emotions in balance, wash your organs
regularly with simple soap an water, and take a winager
solution doush every now and then . last but not least
sleep regularly and avoid processed food if you can.

yea its simple....u ready....STOP BEING A ******* SLUT!!!!!!!

Take a relaxant for nerves and muscles, like Valium. Plus sitting in a tub of very warm water for half an hour before intercourse. Being aroused helps relax the vagina. Use what it takes...touching, movies, certain picture magazines, etc.

As many others have pointed out, vaginismus is almost always a psychological disorder. You report having attended counseling, which is good.

If I were your councilor I would ask about your feelings about sex, masturbation, virginity, and your family of origin鈥檚 views on the same thing.

I would bet a LOT that buried in there somewhere is a strong lesson about girls that have sex, or simply about sex being dirty and or bad 鈥?perhaps even deadly. There may also be some issues surrounding the value of virginity (a common issue in modern American society)

I think the first thing I would try if I were you is simple masturbation, with and without your husband. Once you become more comfortable with that sort of sexual involvement moving to a vibrator, dildo, or other insertable masturbation toy along with a tube of lube, seems to be a logical next step. After you are comfortable with, and enjoy using your vibrator, spending some time, naked, with your husband, where he, or you spend some time putting his penis next to, or even between the lips of your vulva 鈥?but without penetrating 鈥?or trying to penetrate you further. Once you are comfortable with that, an attempt at intercourse may be fruitful.

If that does not work 鈥?looking into a hypnotheripist may be a beneficial option 鈥?but I would not pick that as my first hope.