Have you got over vaginismus? If so how?

I know Im going to get a few stupid answers about being fridgid etc but this really is a serious problem for both me and my husband.

I always thought that I had a problem that was all in my head, I have never been raped or molested in any way but didnt know why I have the problems with sex or anything to do with down there until my GYN discovered that the muscle that causes the problem by spasming or tightening (beyond my control) was actually far too tight - I have had it stretched a couple of times but it doesnt help. I cant use lubricants as they tend to burn me (must be allergic to them)

I have tried dildos but even they burn me - I would be perfectly happy if there were no such thing as sex but this doesnt help my husband and our relationship - when I do allow him to have sex with me I feel a lot of pain and I resent him - it feels like im giving him permission to rape me (I know that sounds silly but people who are or have been in my situation will understand)

I would say keep trying - get a second opinion from another gyn or find therapy also ---
so often us ladies are stressed about sex and our bodies, especially anything relating to our vaginal area (if penetration is such a problem --- how about doing foreplay? oral sex might be a good for you first).... and the muscles in the pelvic area aren't relaxed and if more stress is added they tightening even more... when you quit attempting sex do you feel relaxed inwardly, do your thoughts seem calmer when all attempts of intimacy are gone? Make a list of how you feel when you aren't in an intimate situation with your spouse and then make a list of how you feel when you are out having a good time -- such as getting your hair done or nails done - try to track your stress levels ... be honest with yourself. And keep seeking help for your problem.

let him go down on you b4 you have intercourse if you are allergic to lubricant!

sounds to me like you'r tensing up. try and relaxe. but some people just don't like/need sex and thats ok. but i wouldn't give up yet. and think more positive. if all your thinking is hes raping me your not gonna feel better. and don't feel forced into sex if he really can't accept it forget him.