In the spring of '05, I took Lifespan Growth & Development, which followed General Psyc. Our book was The Developing Person: Through the Lifespan by Dr. Kathleen Berger. However, while the book had a pretty cover & smelled good & crisp, I WANTED TO SET IT ON FIRE by the end of the course! Never in my life has a book INFURIATED me so much! It's like, everything in it was wrong because IT DIDN'T DESCRIBE MY LIFE AT ALL! You see, it's supposed to show how people's bodies & thoughts progress from conception to death, but I thought it did a HORRIBLE job because it was too generalized & didn't say ONE THING about Iris' childhood or life! For example, it said kids 2 & up like group play, but I STILL HAVE NO FRIENDS! Kids are said to be "independent" by 5, but MOM DRESSED ME IN HIGH SCHOOL! Teen girls are said to be conscious of their looks, but I DON'T GIVE A RATS about make-up! At my age, marriage & a career are a big deal, but I STILL LIVE WITH MOM! How do such books go so far in college? Well, first psychology is a soft science.
Second -- an this is where you get PO'd and cut me off -- based on your tone you do have some, what psychologists call, unresolved issues.
The question is where did these issues come from?
Psychology goes hand in hand with sociology, which is the study of the environment you live in. This can have a major affect on you psychology.
Third, this goes to the next issue of many psychological views, which is the fact that mommy and daddy are responsible for it all. Which can be partially true.
Fourth, there is no such thing as an absolue, so just because you don't fit the model doesn't mean things are not "normal."
Fifth, it sounds like you've been avoiding another motif of the "common" pschology mode known as rebellion. This is something children 6 through 26 often go through. Rebellion, especially against their immediate sociological environment. Taking the form of staying out later than you are allowed, saying NO to this and that, no doing what is expected and bacially doing what you want, which is about finding yourself through trial and error.
These things suggest an environment that you have gotten used to, a security blanket you enjoy or at least tolerate.
They can also suggest a strong sociological envirnoment, indicative to things like communal life (e.g. being an Amish child, living out in the woods with no TV or technology, being an "Army brat" going from post to post and living within that sctructured environment, being in a cult, such as being born and raised in a Scientology apartment building).
You say little about your background except as how it applies to the "book norm" which isn't a hard and firm thing, especially since pychology is such a soft science.
A lack of friends can be indicative of many things. Jehovah's witnesses, for example, as well as Mormons frown on relationships outside their church community. If you are rejected by several friendship attempts you could chose to adopt a "loner" attitude. If you are very shy and can't speak readily (which I don't think is a problem in your case) it makes it difficult to make friends.
I have a crossed eye and 10% of the time I get frontal assults, usually from males (never females) and I got called cross-eye and four eyed (glasses) and in late grade school zit face.
These kinds of assults can either harden you (as they did me, as I know what it's now like to be called ******, Wop, Chink, Jewboy or Spick) or send you into the closet never to come out.
Another aspect of psychology you didn't get into was the fact that most pschologists beleive that between the age of 4 and 5 we establish our sexual identity. Gay people I've talked with tell me they knew by age of 5 they felt an affinity to their own sex. I, personally, had three girlfriends by age 6, although I had a few guy friends that I hung out with, rode bikes with and shared rebellioins with, but that was because girls were mostly home bodies and guys wanted to break out of home and see the world. So when I hung with the girls it was close to home, usually close to their home!
Therefore you fit into that female motif. Girls are always close to home and mother.
Before writing this I did your chart as I used to be a professional astrologer. Astrology is also affected by sociology, but the only thing I see in your chart that is adverse is that you have created a fantasy world that you like to live in and have embraced that too much. You need to be more relaistic and practical.
Other than that it should a closeness to home and family, good intelect, good literature and artistic abilities.
Gemini's tend to flitter around too much. They move from flower to flower like a humming bird. That's about the worse thing you can say about them. They lack staying power for a given situation and want to immediately move on to the greener pastures over there to see whats over there and quickly say "been there done that" and move on again!
There is no serious adverse conditions shown in your chart, other than the fantasy issue. Most charts show people to be argumentative, and yours show none of this, in fact it shows some generousity and goodwill.
So, if there is anything holding you back it must be from mommy, daddy or yourself and that's the issue you have to face.
As for masculine female, that's no more of an issue that crossed eyes. You learn to overcome it because only a small percentage of the world will be abusive or abrasive.
The first thing you have to do is be your own person and get a life, as they say. Everything else tends to slowly fall into place thereafter.
This doesn't mean you have be rebellious, unless mommy and daddy are the primary causes, in which case you may have to make a stand and created some waves on the water.
You can live the status quo by simiply saying I'm going out, back later! And leaving.
If someone asks where, the first thing you need to do is say,"whereever."
Now, you're independent.
Then you go find something.
Even the Amish kick their kids out at age 18 and tell them to go exerience life in the outside world, then decided if they want to come back and be Amish forever or stay in "satan's world" and be techo geeks.
Life is about taking the bull by the horns and you will get a few scrapes, scratches and bruses. That's what life is about. It's not a security blanket. the life span books describe average growth and development.if you have no friends it might be because you are anti-social, which is not normal, it is also highly unusual to still have mom dressing you beyond age seven and although not everyone likes makeup you should be out on your own instead of living with your mother, perhaps you fear failure. no there is nothing wrong with your textbook, the problem lies with you The book is one woman's opinion about development. Many things in psychology are theories and there are many "schools of thought". Obviously this book didn't do it for you, so find a book that is more suited to you! There are a ton of them out there!
It's no different than finding a counselor that works for you. There are plenty of idiot counselors out there that think they know what they are doing. There are also many effective ones.
Don't give up altogether!
The best thing you can do is stop comparing yourself to other people. Everyone is different, and who is the person above me to tell you your life is wrong or not. You do what works for you and stop worrying about what everyone else is doing, ok? |
