What should I do about my lack of friends at school?? Im really depressed about it..........?

I am 15 and a junior in high school. after 8th grade i moved to a new town and went to a new school where i only knew 1 person. i quickly had 3 close friends. one of them is into sex and drugs now (she used to not be like that) and she transferred schools, the other ditched me for another group of friends, and the one i knew from before is still an o.k. friend.but at lunch she goes home alot so i am stuck in the library alll alone at lunch and so pretty much i am a loner. this really hurts; esp. b/c at my old school i had a ton of friends...what do i do? i always walk around school alone and feel so lonely..im really nice but quiet too.im not quiet around friends tho. im only quiet around people i don't know well so technically i am quiet all the time now. this really stresses me out how im a loner at school and has affected my health - i get really bad tension headaches now and today at my doctor for my physical he said my blood pressure and pulse were high...what do i do?

i cannot believe my one friend ditched me..she used to be so nice.anyways do friends in high school really matter??my friends from junior high dont even keep in touch..so i dont know.. i get my license in a month anyways so i can drive home during lunch.....and DONT TELL ME OH JUST JOIN A CLUB! i am in 5 clubs and on the basketball team..am i hopeless? everyone seems to have their own little group of friends already........... and my friend who ditched me..i saw her walking around with her new friends yesterday downtown..iwas so sad..

Being thought of as quiet can have many disadvantages, as you've found out. How can anyone really get to know you when you have little to say.

What to do? Dare I say grin and bear it. I don't mean grin, I mean smile, smile a lot. Others might notice how pleasant you seem to be and gravitate toward you. Teenaged girls can be careless, not noticing who is alone, being so wrapped up in themselves and their friends. Somewhere in that new school, there must be one or more girls who feel just as you do. Eventually you'll find one another. Or hunt them up if you must. Not everyone is in a clique.

What I find especially touching is that you've not mentioned boys. Seeking out a boyfriend right now would definitely not be a good idea. You might be drawn to the wrong type of guy. Keep looking for girls with whom you can be chummy, others who are as lonely as you are. They will show up. Honest. In fact, once you start driving, you might find yourself with more 'friends' than you really want, some ready to take advantage. You'll know which ones you want to keep.

This business with the tension headaches is a worry, as is the blood pressure. Both problems will be relieved if you can maybe practise Yoga. Get a DVD or tape or join a group (yes, sorry, another group). Your health is so very important.

You write extremely well for a girl your age. Are you in a writing or poetry group? It's not really necessary to join one, but even journal writing will help you through this tough time. Aim for eventual publication. I'm not buttering you up. You really have a way with words, which is unusual, considering what your peers are posting in Y!A.

Keep on keeping on, hon. You've got a lot to offer.

I was about to say join a club... jk... be really friendly to people, I mean of course it's not necessary to have friends, but since it's affecting your health I would say you need them. Most people I know (I'm in High School) are friendly, they just don't go out of there way to meet new people. Just because some people seem to already have their own little groups doesn't mean they don't want to hang out or make their group a little bigger. So get yourself noticed, be friendly, sociable, but don't overdo it.

hmm, it seems like your trying. highschool can be pretty difficult trust me, it was THE hardest for me to make friends. I guess maybe you should open up to your teammates on the basketball team. say, how you wish you can have a relationship outside the court. sit with one of the girls at lunch, just say can i sit here? and dont be discouraged if they get all mean and say no, go ask someone else. just ask to sit next to someone.

I'm so sorry for your pain right now. I went through something similiar when I was in high school..I think alot do. Not everyone is surrounded by friends 24/7. You make it sound like it's bad to be quiet..it's not! Quiet people are introspective and deep thinkers.

You say you're already in 5 clubs, wow, that's alot. Maybe you're overworked? And on the basketball team too?? Are you enjoying yourself? I'd suggest cutting back and being in ONE club that you really enjoy. Do you like theater? Singing? I joined the Journalism group and found writing the paper gave me alot of contacts..you will have to interview alot of people, and that's a good way to make friends.

Another thing to remember is letting go of preconceived notions of what kind of people you want to hang around. Even if that one girl or guy looks nerdy, go talk to them. They could be a good friend. I started smiling everyday, at random people. I'd say hi as I passed them. I found people being drawn to me...and found myself not wanting to answer the phone cuz so many people wanted to hang out, LOL. But like I said, it comes and goes.

I really hope you find a good buddy... just try to make more eye contact, ask their interests, and stop eating in the library alone. Go into the cafeteria and strike up a conversation. It could be funny- "hey guys, I'm doing a paper, who's the jerkiest teacher here? What did they do to you?" People LOVE to talk about themselves. Be a good listener, smile and take on the world.

that really sucks.. im sorry. but look at it like this, having no friends means you can start from scratch. just talk to people, everyone, even if its just a small comment. find people with similar interests like tastes in music, or get into a musical instrument and find people who play those too and jam.. start out small.. you know, when you see someone you know say hey did you finish that dumb math homework. then make a comment about something theyre wearing, maybe say oh cute purse! be expressive.. be loud be spontanious be funny! people love it! they'll forget you were ever a loner because you'll impress them.. they wont see it coming. just do it! tomorrow when you are at school, i challenge you to talk to atleast 10 new people, anyone. who cares what attitude they give you just laugh it off, they're just waiting for you to prove yourself to them. so do it! :D

audition for a play, join some cooking classes, throw a halloween party, strike a convo with a potential friend that you kind of talk to and bring up a movie night or a sleepover and invite her over, don't listen to the first jerk face about cutting your wrists, your probably smart enough to know that tho, but i know it's hard to make friends when your new, just stay nice, and don't change who you are, that's hard to hear, but if you accept you, others will accept you

you said a junior in high school?
that's part of the problem. many students who skip grades have to deal with things like that. High school friends do matter, as high school is a major part of your physical and mental growth. My suggestion: if you cannot make friends with students, try teachers.

the best way to make friends,is to join activities where you have the same interests.
avoid people you know that take drugs.they will only bring you down to their level.and you sound like a really nice person.you deserve friends who will respect you and look out for your well-being.
what are some of your interests?do you like sports?swimming,girls' basketball,running track?volleyball?soccer?
or how about the school band?do you enjoy playing any instruments?
or how about singing?or acting in school plays?
painting?drawing?
cheerleading?
whatever you like to do,it's good to find friends who enjoy the same things.that way,you'll have things in common.and you'll know what you want,and what you don't want,in a friend.
also,you can make good friends who have your same personality.if you're outgoing,or you're quiet and laid-back,whatever your personality,your friends might be the same way.or you might want friends who have a different personality.outgoing people are drawn towards quiet,reserved people.they tend to bring quiet people out of their shell.and quiet people help outgoing people,to slow down and enjoy life.outgoing people like to go from one thing to another.they're so busy experiencing everything they can think of,they don't take time to enjoy those experiences.being a teenager,should be a happy and fun time of your life.with friends who share the same interests,and friends who have different personalities,you can experience a variety of good things.the important thing,is to find friends you like.and they like you.people you want in your life.don't be friends with someone,if you don't want to.be friends with people who add to your life.and that you have fun with.people who make you feel happy.people who are a positive influence on you.not negative.
talk to your guidance counselor,also.they can give you ideas.and talk to your parents.and other people you trust.there's lots of people who can suggest different things.and they understand how you feel.because they've been there themselves once.and they can share with you,what helped them.good luck.i hope i could help some.

yeah i know how that is, i moved to a new school after 8th grade too, I didn't know anyone, i felt like such an idiot before the bell rang in the morning and at lunch time b/c i was always walking around the school by myself i felt extremely out of place. I finally joined art club and band where i started to make more friends. I remember one day, i decided i was going to sit with the girls in my section during lunch break on saturday band practice, i was sooooo nervous, so i went up to them and asked if i could sit down with them and they said yes. At first i just sat there and ate, but then one of them mentioned a movie that she was trying to describe to one of the other girls, she couldn't remember the title but i knew what it was, i offered her the name and i also made a small comment that i also saw that film and that i had liked it. From there she would turn toward me also as she talked like she was including me in the conversation, so i felt more brave about speaking and soon before i knew it lunch was over, and i was laughing and smiling with them. Now i'm not saying after that i was popular over night, but it opened the doors for me to meet new people at the school and soon, i had lots of close friends and i was acquainted with most of the students in my class. It just takes small steps and patience, i didn't have that brave lunch experience untill Nov. and school started in Aug.!!!! So don't feel discouraged, friends will come, Next time you go to school try striking up a small conversation with somebody who sits next to you in one of your classes, Comment on how you like the shoes of the girl who sits in front of you in english class. Or tell the guy that sits next to you in history how boring you think the teacher is. It sounds corny but it's worth a shot. And you never know maybe the person you choose to speak to has always wanted to talk to you but they didn't feel comfortable. Keeping to yourself, and being too quite can make some people feel uncomfortable around you. Make yourself approachable, remember if you put out the signals that you dont' want to fit in, people will be sure that you don't... ( I quote the film Pretty in Pink). Anyways, don't stress yourself you're too young, I hope my advice helps you and if you ever need somebody to talk too you can e-mail me :)

Good luck :)

I know the feeling. I had tons of friends in h.s. but junior year i switched schools and had only 2 friends who i only talked to in school. So yeah I know it stinks. But I think it would probably be a good idea to get involved in some activities at school. It's a sure fire way to meet people and have fun. I know most kids your age really aren't into clubs, etc. but really they are a great idea and a quick way to meet kids. Good Luck and keep your chin up :)

if i were u i would join a club or play a sport. If that doesnt work i would start cutting your wrists.