I want to have a baby, but I am on dialysis.?

I am 20 years old, and have been on peritoneal dialysis for over a year. I still have about 10% kidney function left. I have been turned down for a transplant at 2 different transplant centers. I am afraid that I will keep getting turned down. The surgeons are afraid to perform a transplant on me bc of a blood clotting disorder that I have.

I know that waiting until I get a transplant would be the best way for me to conceive, but what if I cannot get a transplant? I am afraid that if I wait too long and am left to conceive on dialysis, then it will be harder bc I won't have as much or any kidney function left.

I have not talked to my nephrologist about this. I am afraid to. My mom, fiance and friends have encouraged me to talk to my neph about this, but I am scared of what he would say. I want a few more opinions before I make the decision to or not to talk to my neph. Any opinions, advice, and suggestions are welcome.

Ok, a few more details to answer some of your concerns. I do have the capabilities to take care of a baby. Yes, I am on dialysis, but I do it at night while I sleep. During the day, I am just like everyone else. No one would ever guess that I was on dialysis, unless I told them. I am pretty energetic, and I cook and clean, I am in college full-time and I run a website. I am totally capable of handling a baby.

I do trust my DR totally. I am just scared to bring it up, bc I know it is kind of a bad idea, but I am afraid that I won't be able to get a transplant and will lose all of my remaining kidney function. Then I REALLY won't be able to carry a healthy baby.

My blood clotting disorder is hereditary. My mom has it, and my younger sister has it, but neither of them have had any issues with it. They didn't even know they had it until I developed a DVT at the age of 16. My kidney disease is not hereditary and neither are any of my other medical issues.

May I ask a question

Is there any possibility that these issues you are dealing with are heredetary... and if so... why not adopt?

Next, you are young & with major health issues
a child.. at a minimum is a 20 year commitment
what are you going to do if you become unable to properly parent

Please, I don't intend to be mean or anything
But thise are some things you really must consider

I am sorry.. but sometimes you have to look at the worst-possible-outcome for the most-to-be-affected person

In this case, potentially hereditary blood clotting disorder, minimal kidney function, and whatever else.. and then.. if you weren't capable or died.. ... what then for the child (the most-affected person)

Being a mother is a full time job.

If you don't have the capabilities to be at least a 90% mom then you shouldn't do it. It's just not fair to the child.

I'm sorry.

your only option is to concentrate on getting healthy. you could become pregnant and possibly carry a baby to term, but it might kill you. not to be harsh, but don't be selfish. a child needs and wants a mother in their lives. i will pray for you to have a full recovery and that you can someday have your wish of becoming a mother. you will make a wonderful one, as long as you are here. you have to talk to your Dr. if you don't trust him enough to talk to him...you need to find a new Dr. good luck to you.

I'm sure the others have brought these points up:

- do you have the resources (money, etc) and energy to take care of a baby?

- are you willing to accept the risks to both you and the baby?

The kidneys have to filter about 60% more blood when you're pregnant. Most likely, if you get pregnant, you will be considered a high risk pregnancy and be referred to an appropriate doctor. Plus, you are young which may mean that your body is still developing.

I hope you get a transplant. Even so, you will have to be taking meds for the rest of your life. I know that is all disheartening, but perhaps your doctors can offer more alternatives.