I am a doctor and addicted to narcotics.?

I am an anesthesiologist. I love my job and love helping people who are in severe pain and who are dying or suffering from major injuries. I love to treat car accident victims, cancer patients, and to anesthetize patients before a surgery. There is nothing more rewarding than relieving a cancer patient's suffering. For the past 15 years I have been ordering extra medication for my patients and taking a certain amount for myself. I have been stealing narcotics from the hospital and I am very ashamed. I have a severe problem with addiction. I want to stop and I was clean for half a month and experienced such bad withdrawals I had to take vacation hours to rest. I just can't resist taking narcotics. I try and I stop doing it for about a day or two and then I'm back to my old ways. It's much too hard to resist these things. I am extremely depressed and sick of shaming my mother and upsetting my wife. I need help. What can I do without risking my job and upsetting everyone I love.

Having an addiction is a stressful and shameful experience. As a substance abuse counselor, I would strongly suggest you click on the link below to conduct a treatment search. The web address is from NYS but there is a link for a national search in case you don't reside in NY. I would suggest you see an addictions specialist ASAP. Many places of employment have an EAP (employee assistance program) where you can go and talk to the therapists there and receive services. Even though it is through your workplace, it should be confidential. If you are wary of this option, you can always seek private treatment on your own. Successful treatment of addiction lies with consistency, dedication and support from family and friends. 97% will relapse solely b/c they don't have the support from others. You can obtain this through meetings, family or professionals. Some form of family therapy may also help as addiction not only affects you but the people around you who care about you. Many times those who are taking drugs may have an underlying Dx and may be substituting with illicit use to self medicate. Perhaps seeing a psychiatrist or a therapist will also be beneficial. You seem to be functioning on the job so I am not yet certain that you require in patient treatment but perhaps you may want to consider a leave of absence to re-group and jump start your treatment and stabilize yourself. But do understand that every time you take drugs in this manner, you are PUTTING THE VERY PATIENTS THAT YOU SEEM TO CARE SO MUCH ABOUT AT RISK. NARCOTICS DO CLOUD YOUR JUDGMENT AND YOU ARE NOT ONLY PLACING THE LIVES OF YOUR PATIENTS IN DANGER BUT ALSO YOUR LIVELIHOOD. I don't know if you really are a Dr. but I will say to the writer above that Dr's are not necessarily savvy about addiction especially when it's happening to them. Good luck.

Thank you to everyone who helped. I would have picked all of your answers if I could because they were all so informative and different. Report It

If you really are a doctor - you would know how to get help without posting a query on this board. What are you trying to do accomplish with this post? On the off chance that you are serious (and for the sake of your patients, I hope you are just a weird person looking for attention) - start with your state medical board. They all have programs for impaired physicians.

If you are a weirdo, though. That is ok! Just look in the mirror and say "I'm a good person who wants attention. No really I am. I am worthy of my own love." That should make you feel better.

You need to get help through NA and you need it fast. You can be bared for life as a doctor and the FDA would love to talk to you. You need to stop this NOW, and get help before you destroy your career!

ummm ..... you are @ risk of losing your job over this one
be very careful and make sure the person helping you can be trusted .... try something like an anonymous org. or something like this http://www.addict-help.com/find-treatmen...
good luck & best wishes .... I know you can do this!

I've read the items here I like the state board referral idea. The 3 per hundred no relapse rate makes me think narcotics abusing physicians will have better luck purposefully ceasing usage at the start of each month. After a year you'll have a third of a chance of winning

Sounds dumb but if you've been at this more than a decade thats more than 300pt chance of success which is rather wonderful.

It is opportune to know that through UNICEF you can preserve a human life at between 10 n 30 c with oral rehydration therapy. If you'd like to go with a smugness opportunity you could carve 100k from your medical earnings each year to go to UNICEF

Each year as a narcotized physician you'd save up to a million lives. Iodine supplementation is also highly effective. think of it as the Mega Hawkeye Pierce program; sure he has a substance problem, but he saves lives.

Whats niftier Hawkeye "shaming" or Hawkeye bringing medical effeciveness Go with medical effectiveness

There is a thing called best docters n America If you use that to find a physician with a no relapse rate better than 10 per hundred you might be clean this year and save a million lives with a UNICEF donation and keep your job

I'm a MVA patient who has chronic rheumatoid arthritis on top off it after I live with constant severe pain from accident really bad back injuries it ruined my life.My Dr's put me on Oxycontin after surgery wow first time in 23 years I have had some relief from the pain it makes you very depressed my heads alert my body half dead,anyway my Dr's are bitchin at me for taking them they really work and i don't want to be bed ridden most of my life these things have me up on my feet and I love it i"m actually enjoying being alive and they want to stop all that.Why don't you try a pain management clinic like I will have to do again.Because I believe you would be experiencing pain from withdrawal,You need to get a grip of yourself mate because your future is in danger of being not so good if you don't and its not just all about you so being a Dr you must know of some way to get help without losing your job I wish you well because we need good caring Dr's ones that enjoy being there so get better and hurry up mate.Take care

Instead of taking your vacation hours to rest, get to a rehab clinic. Your mother and wife apparently are aware of your problem. I would also consider finding an addiction group. You are asking for help, however, you are afraid of risking your job. I believe, at this time your health is more important then your job at this time. You can not get effeicient and effective help for you problem if you don't come clean to the hospital you work for. I know from working at a health care facility, they take care of their own. You need to tell and make it aware to a superior who can get you the help you need and perhaps save your job in the process. Face it, eventually, they will catch on with the deceptful tactics you have been doing ordering more medication then necessary. Then you will lose your job. Time to face up to your problem and not just half way, if you really want to kick the habit.

You are not unusual in your profession. Most states have programs which will allow the physician to get treatment and return to medical practice. Please get help now before you hurt a patient or yourself.

I know two physicians who went through a program and returned to help others.

You can contact your state medical society, the state board of medical examiners for your state or a professional organization for information.

http://www.asahq.org/Newsletters/2001/05...

That God I am not having surgery anytime soon. Try having Periodic Paralysis Disorder, having a muscle biopsy and someone forgetting to refrigerate my *amn muscle and having to go back and be cut open again then going back to work 1 day later with no *amn leg to walk on then recieving a BIG bill and told to pay it!!!! Maybe you should take a LOA...people like you p*** me off...besides now I am broke!!!