26 yr old son with cp and mental retardation is on hospice and they say he can go anytime....?

my question as a mother is i know its going to happen, i try and pretend its not going to happen... are these feelings normal?

Of course it's normal. Because I believe that we want to hope upon hope, deep down inside,that a miracle will happen and our loved one will get better. So, we can think rationally all we want, but our hearts don't give up that easily. If he is in hospice, it would be a good thing to talk about with the staff, since this is their speciality. I'm so sorry for you, I realize he's still your son, and it's hard to let go.

May God be with you in a mighty way, mom!
Yes, it is normal. It is just as normal as the feelings of many children who know their mom/dad is dying. I feel that knowing one's child is dying is more heart rending than watching a parent die. We are supposed to go before our children.
I don't know you, your son or your names, but I will lift you both up in prayer in my class tomorrow.

sure it is normal to feel this way, I mean.. my god, the worst fear of any parent is happening and of course this is monumentaly difficult to deal with. I hope you do have some kind of support system for you and your son. don't do this alone. you and yours are in my prayers (hugs)

yes it is

hugs to you at this stressful time

Absolutely. There is a thing called anticipatory grief and it involves all the same stages as Elizabeth Kuhbler-Ross' 5 stages of grief. Denial is the first stage. But it is extremely important that you spend time with your son while you still can for the obvious reasons and so you can see with your own eyes that he is indeed dying. I hope you're able to be there during active death so that you can speak to him until the very end. This will help make it real to you so that you can move on through all the stages to acceptance. It may be that you already know this. Go to your son. He needs you... and God bless.

definatley. your child is hurting and in turn, you are hurting. i cant imagine what kind of pain you are in and i am deeply sorry. pretending like nothin is happening is your way of dealing with the pain. i dont think it's the healthiest way and i would suggest to get some therapy. not because your crazy, but because it would help you unload some of your feelings. oh, and dont just go there a couple times, you may need to participate for a long time to have it truly help you.

I'm so sorry for you and my prayers are with you and your son. Your behaviours and feelings are totally natural... who would want to give up hope in this situation??

When you are feeling like you can deal with an easily learned and applied energy therapy to help you with your grieving, you might want to check out cutting-edge e f t.... I have found it to be an excellent bridge during times of loss and sorrow. Go here: http://www.emofree.com/AffiliateWiz/aw.a...

God bless!