It's been a year that i've been living in solitude after a chain of "drama" in my life. Is this just a phase?

It is detrimental to my mental health if i keep on living this way forever? Or is it "benign"? Is it okay for my health if i keep on living this way, as it keeps me feel secure and content? Can humans really live alone? Perhaps with books, passion (my passion is poetry), computer and shopping malls. Is it harmful for the mind to not engage in societal interactions? I don't really bother what society thinks of me but will this harm my health, perhaps mentally? I had enough of dramas, tragedies and accidents due to societal interactions. I'm done with men, and i am not a lesbian. I feel so much better now when i am alone. I can't say that i'm happy but i'm content and secure with my current state of living in solitude. My aloofness calms my heart. I do have very few trusted close friends whom i'm comfortable but we don't get to see each other that often. I'm no longer dating or doing anything social. I just feel that i had enough of emotional turmoils due to my social life since i was 13

until i'm 23 last year. My life has been so eventful that it could even come out as a best-selling novel. So if somehow this is not just a phase and i will keep on being in solitude forever, will it be detrimental for my mental health? I've gone through therapy. I'm okay now. I just prefer to be alone.

I don't think it's detrimental at all. I understand completely being so harried by the drama of the world that you just want to fade away. And complete withdrawl from social situations is nothing to worry about. It's a self-protective measure, a mental hibernation as it were. I wouldn't worry about that. Actually, I have a poem for you. Hope you like it.

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Par for the course...

You're doing good...people who are constantly fighting so hard to keep up the situation of "never being alone," kind of frighten me, and I wonder where their "courage and fortitude" are...

I've been in 3 good, major, successful long-term relationships (they were successful for a while...until they weren't) and I can tell you this...

If I was so terrified of being "single," I would've been in a "baker's dozen" of other "bad" long-term relationships that would have made me lose my integrity, soul, and warm-hearted attitude toward love...

Grant you...I've been in a "baker's dozen" of good, short-term relationships...but what made them "good" was...

I courageously (even now) learned how to enjoy being "single," so when I DO get "not single," my woman enjoys my relaxed state of "holding on loosely, but not letting go," and therefore likes being around me, because I'm not some "needy guy," I am "The Guy" who "Wants Her..."

Not "needs" her...

I "want" her...

There's a difference....and that...

Makes all the difference...

I understand how you feel but this could lead to social phobia ..agraphobia and anxiety probably best to seek some therapy to talk about past history as you are young and you have a life a head of you i from your age lived alone and stayed away because of past dramas or truamas..and i at 31 suffer from the things i have mentioned above i ahve to take medication to leave the house and i have two different types of therapy..better to deal with things now rather than later!!

there are times we need to withdraw to refresh ourselves, but there should also be time to face the WORLD with others again. we have fears. and somehow, i also am not comfortable with a lot of crowd due to hurt. sometimes i just wish to be in bed. but then, being alone all the time is MISSING the many graces out there! I know there is a lot more to the world than PAIN. If i am hurt, I say it, I write it down, feel that moment, and make certain resolutions that will make me a BETTER PERSON. I don't want to live in fear all the time. So everyday really is for me an act of courage. TO GO OUT THERE IS A RISK WORTH-TAKING! Take care of yourself, miss.

Let it ride for awhile. I, used to live in Oregon. Alone in a very nice cabin. Because, Vietnam was stuck in my head. I, was
divorced and suicidal and wanted to be alone. I, bought this cabin and cat and I had a good life. But sometimes I, would get the blues. I mean, I loved good conversation. After 10
months alone, I, decided that I could not just put my life on
hold forever. And I rejoined society, met my soul mate and
life is good. There, are still alot of pot holes. but we manage.
If this goes on much longer, You should seek help. Love to
you.

That means i'm not the only one. a great relief to know that.WOW i'm not the only one with a life full off dramas, that always made me unhappy. (infact i was never happy).
But still u r secure. You have learnt to be. I've been totally lost since last 6 months. My family never trusted me. I've always been a bad boy, a crap for them.
I want to be alone but i'm wanting a frnd to whom i can share with .
forget about me.

well u ,
this a phase in which u have learnt to live alone. This will go off. DONT WORRY!
and when i say so confidently about something it comes true. it always happens when i say good about others or ppl in problem.
(it nvr happens for me though).
SOMETIMES darkness,aloneness and silence give positive effects.Till u dont allow them to feast on u.
AS poetry is ur passion u can pen down ur anger or any negative feeling which u have.
IT wont affect your mental health.
( till u dont make britney ur idol{lol} )
Sometimes this leads to drug addiction and PLEASE........ stay AWAY from DRUGS!.


ONE day you WILL meet a person who will change your life. Forever.
but for that u have to get a bit mixed up. I'm not telling u to get social(thats wat u dont want)
BUT if someone gets friendly with u (due some reasons like same past or going through same situation)
Dont kick her/ him away. try to get friendly if u want .
i'll just say that "BE HAPPY ALWAYS!"

Like a little turtle, in your shell, you feel secure and protected in your own space...for now, if this is what you needto do, this is fine..you are here, reaching out, with thousands of friends at your fingertips, if you want them...sometimes, we need to just stay within our own limits, and kinda step out when only we are ready...so cute little turtle, stay inside where you are safe, you always have us!

I like being alone, but there are times I need companionship. As I get older, I find that I am drawn closer to others. For 22 years after returning from Vietnam, I was with people, but felt alone. I was, as the saying goes, "Alone in a crowd". That is a bad feeling, and the constant nightmares didn't help either. I had ghosts in my mind at night telling me to do something about the lies and false stories being told of the fighting there. I finally wrote a short poem, and it all went away. The ghosts quit haunting my dreams, and the feeling of always being alone left me. I took a 3 month vacation alone, and went into the Catalina Mountains in Arizona, and lived for those three months, truly alone in the world. When I went home, I was back to as much normal as ever. Being alone can be scary, but it is survivable, and can be enjoyable. Do not rush to find someone, bide your time, and wait for the right one to come along. If you have ANY doubts, back up and take another look. My advise.

Sounds a very eventful life so far but am confident, being a literary personage you'll overcome those woes. You deserve no pity but sympathy. perhaps one day, you may pen that self-referential story about your own events without witnesses!
When that time comes, I'd recommend for you Dorothy Allison's Trash, Jacqueline Woodson's Autobiography of a Family Photo and Calixthe Beyala's Your Name Shall be Tanga. A time there was when all three decided to live. Such a decision, of course, raises a lot of ethical questions.
Thanks to your question, I have gathered a few tidbits about Dondi. I find his confessional narrative quite interesting and also worth documenting in a longer self-referential narrative!
take care

When my ex hurt me so badly I withdrew to an apartment for one year and lived off the money that I'd saved up. Contemplated the past, the pain, the insanity of being run over by a car by the girl who "said she loved me", didn't answer the phone, and quite simply dug myself into a cave.

Then the day came I stood in the door listening to cars pass by and watching people being productive in the world. Going to work.

I ended up writing a book called "It Happens To Men Too". During this time I realized that it's ok to withdraw and regroup.

Once I heard a song which said, "you add up your losses, gather your forces, then you try again". That was my que to get going.

It's okay to withdraw and figure things out but it's not okay to stay in that zone. I'd say it's emotionally dangerous for a person.

Interacting with others is called "positive stroking" in which others compliment you, encourage you, support you, laugh and cry with you, communicate with you, and on. This is part of how we come to feel good about ourselves and that inner voice tells us we're okay. It's a healthy for emotional stability.

I can promise you that there are 1000's of people who're going through and feeling the same as you. Take care. You're worth it.

As long as you don't expect approval from those around you (even here on this board I see from some of your responses) and you are ok with your lifestyle, nothing else matters really. Most people won't understand folks who like their simple, quiet life of solitude with few friends. For some, there IS nothing more satisfying than a time in life to as you say, 'stop all the damn drama' and just live your own life in peace and do it your way.
Frankly, that's healthy and as long as you don't slip into becoming a complete "hermit" which is a state of becoming completely anti-social and filled with anxiety at being around people at all, you are doing no less for yourself than going on an extended retreat to gather your own inner resources and find your own inner power and strength again.
Some of us truly need that to heal so we can pick up our lives and begin again. Sounds to me like you've done that and you are quite happy and content. The fact that you are questioning and seeking a check on your balance, says that you are perfectly healthy. Unhealthy folks don't question their lives at all, they're too sick, too lost, too out of control.

I thought I was the only one who looks forward to solitude for life...Life brings too much drama...fortunately you have only had 10 years of it.... there is something about not needing to be with someone all the time...at least in this phase of my life...

I don't think its harmful at all...