What's my problem? (Mental Health disorders)?

What's my problem? (Mental Health disorders)?
I have been aware that something about me is amiss ever since childhood and I still don't know what my problem is.

Just about everything has been suggested and/or diagnosed at some point with a variety of "disorders" including depression, ADD, social anxiety disorder, High Functioning Autism, Asparagers, I forget what else honestly but it probably leaving me worse off than where I started, a common problem in psychology because there is too many unknowns about the mind to go about labeling people the way we do). Furthermore, one of the major flaws I have learned is that each disorder has way too many symptoms to the point that it makes it easy to apply just about any disability to an individual, but never really finding the right one.

But anyway, what I do know for certain is that I am AWFUL in social situations and a complete embarassment to myself and EVEN THOUGH I have enough awareness of what I do wrong in these situations, I still can't seem to change it naturally or even force it. Examples of this include not "getting" jokes so i might sort of half assed pretend that I do, forcing eye contact in conversation frequently, electing to be alone far more often than hanging out with friends, no ability to engage in small talk whatsoever. As a result I do have a tendency to withdraw as a learned defense mechanism. It is NOT that I would prefer to avoid social situations, but rather I am such a social cripple and as a result I have learned to do withdraw or disconnect even though I would love to be join in, associate myself with other people better, engage in conversations that everyone else is involved in.

Everyone I know or have met labels me as "shy" but my problem isn't holding back in a conversation due to fear of judgment from others like many others think. No, my problem is having nothing to say, no place, lack of interest (that I'll try to force at times), etc. Lets just put it this way, I have the same problems around the people I am most comfortable with, so lets dismiss the whole "shy" thing here. I will admit, however, that I am often extremely nervous as a result of feeling disconnected from others but I have never suffered from a panic attack. and so I ask you guys out there: What IS wrong with me? Any psychology buffs have an answer to my case or am I bound to live with the knowledge that I have a problem that is impossible to ever get an accurate diagnosis for because of the factors i mentioned in the 1st paragraph?

I appreciate everybody's insight here. Each and every answer here was helpful and if I could select multiple "best answers" here I definetely would. Something I want to add, however, to those who suggested depression and anti-depressants is that this all started with a shrink that I started seeing during a time when I didn't feel I needed one at all! My family decided that their problems at the time were effecting me when it really wasn't, and in the end of it all I was prescribed Prozac by a psychiatrist, and it did nothing but send me down a path of confusion for the last 7-8 years where I have been prescribed to all sorts of BS and I really believe that it is because of this that I am where I am today... and now feeling like I have more mental issues than ever. Like the last answer suggested, maybe a good shrink would have helped, but maybe not. Basically I'm saying from personal experience is be careful if you decide to seek medical help because it might just leave you worseOff

This clearly can't be diagnosed in YAnswers. i would need more info than this and would have to do a social, family and developmental history to better grasp the issue. For example, I'd want to know if the situation is worsened by caffeine or by a heightened emotional state and a host of numerous other questions. What you describe, w/o a comprehensive evaluation, could indicate anything from agoraphobia to mad cow disease to an anxiety disorder (yep, I know these are strange examples, but they make the point).

Our profession is far from exact, but a very good shrink can be very useful. In our practice, at times we run into mystery conditions and the only way to diagnose is to see which medication it responds to. For example, depression can come from hyperthyroidism, low blood sugar, a metabolic disorder or any other host of illnesses. A blood draw can be helpful at times, and responding well to a specific medication can be useful in delineating the condition.

None of us can give you a diagnosis, but an excellent psychologist/psychiatrist can go a long way.


Good Luck. Hope this helps.

I'd be willing to bet you're either in your teens or early 20's. This 'problem' you have is shared by most people in that age range, and it's completely normal. None of us are born with the ability to engage in conversation or 'get' jokes, or to even be comfortable in social situations. Most people have felt the exact same way you do. I think your biggest problem, is that you're too intelligent and too analytical. This causes you to recognize that you're not as glib as those around you, and makes you over analyze the situation, making you so self conscious that you create further problems by walling yourself off.

I can say most people feel this way, because I know a lot of people who drink or do drugs in social situations because they feel so awkward. This, of course, is not the answer, but that's their way of coping, oftentimes because they're not smart enough to figure out another way, or they're too lazy.

I think you need to just be comfortable in your own skin. You don't have a problem to cure, you just have a problem to cope with, just like many other people. Once you realize other people really don't care if you get the jokes, or don't want to engage in small talk, you will feel more confident to act in a way that is more relaxed.

By the time people get into their later 20's, they tend to figure out how to cope, either by drinking, drugs, meds, or simply changing their expectations of what other people think. They learn to not be so self conscious, because they realize most people are so self absorbed that you can practically run around naked with a lamp shade on your head, and half the people around you wouldn't notice.

You sound like me. My therepaist/counsellor person says I probably suffer from depression and I know for a fact I have social anxiety disorder. Sometimes I feel like I can't relate to people whatsoever, like they're conversation I just can't insert myself into. I also suffer from panic attacks and just to add to my odd list here I've been dealing with compulsive lying which is a result of my social anxiety (or so says the counsellor) and I'm not shy either, I just sometimes have nothing to say and feel disconnected from a grouop. And I suck at meeting new people, I'm like the quietest person on Earth when I meet new people unless I'm with someone who makes me feel comfortable (which are very few people) sounds like social anxiety to me cuz that's what I have and you sound similar to me.

Can't diagnose over Yahoo, so I think you are not going to get a really good answer here, just a lot of speculation (but maybe some emotional support, so that's worth it in and of itself). If you have insurance, a psychologist or psychiatrist's the way to go; a competent Ph.D. or M.D. should be able to discern the specific problem(s) through talking with you and doing some testing, and help you address them. If you don't have insurance or enough money for the above, it could be that your regular doctor may want to try something like Prozac with you and see whether the mood elevation benefits your social abilities any. Could be worth a shot. Good luck.

I think you just need to get laid, you have to much toxic poison stuck in you. hahahahaha, just kidding
I am not politically correct, so bear with me here.
I think it's a phobia, I was like that in my younger years. Finally a doctor prescribed me a anxiety type medication, sorry, can't remember the name, but now days, I talk to total strangers.
I am on Alprazolam (anxiety med) or zanax
I would see a doctor, not a shrink, a reg doctor and explain just what you have said here.
Another contributing factor could be your environment, maybe you really don't fit in to the area where you are. Maybe you have nothing in common with the people around you and their chatting is boring you. Maybe you need to head to the beach, or the mountains, some where that you truly love

Regardless of the diagnosis,you will have to try to make a afford to change IF you want to.Try asking questions and listening is the first step in conversation.if you are not interested maybe depression could be one of the problems.take a public speaking class,research your symptoms on the Internet,research herbal remedies if you are not taking medications for any of the diagnosis.Hope this help?