Desperately need help with my son. Can ANYONE help?

I have a 33 year old son and my husband and I are worried about him.
He's a handsome, intelligent man, who was always popular. He worked as a newspaper journalist, but when cutbacks left him unemployed after 7 years, he totally changed. Always a hard worker, he soon landed another reporter job, but he didn't like the job after a month and quit. He fell into a depression and we had to bring him back home, as he was living 1000 miles away. He wont take antidepressants because of their side-effects.
He wanted so bad to work and sent his resume everywhere. He landed a lucrative job, but had a breakdown on the first day and quit. That was 2 weeks ago. Since then he has kept to himself all the time. I came home yesterday when he wasn't expecting me and I caught him sobbing uncontrollably in his room.
He was diagnosed in childhood with whats called Non-verbal Learning Disorder. I don't know if this is important.

Somebody please help me.

He is having a mental disorder I would say. A chemical imbalacne that is not enabling him to cope with things or make decisions...

If he won't accpet help, here in Canada, you can be put in a mental ward under the basis of needing medical help and not seeking it. It is short term, but gets you on medication

He needs to get into therapy and if he refuses you must stand your ground and tell him he can't stay with you if he isn't willing to help himself.

If he refuses to take drugs, get him to a psychiatrist ASAP. They can offer alternative drugs that may not have such severe side effects or just offer some much-needed therapy. Drugs can only treat the symptoms sometimes; perhaps he needs to just speak with someone who can help him work out his problems.

I am so sorry to hear about that. His might be a clinical depression and that can only be cured with a doctor's help. Why not try to convince him to see one or maybe a psychologist/psychiatrist that he can pour his heart out. Also, is there anyway you can wisk him away for a weekend somewhere nice, like the beach or something and you can go as a family. Somewhere where he can take his mind off things for a bit. I have a son that is 7 and I am brasing myself for a possibility of something like this. Depression runs in my family. I sympathize with you. Please get him some help soon.

he definitely needs help, You can start with taking him to a psychiatrist or a psychologist who can councel him, prescribe medicines if needed (psychologists probably don't prescribe) and consider if childhood disorders are playing a role here. Your personal support and persistance with this kind of things are equally important, he has to stick to medicines for relief, good luck

I would get him in to see a therapist! He needs some major depression meds, and also some counseling about his mental and physical status. I would do it quick because you dont want him to contemplate suicide. That is a major issue with depression and job loss! I wish you all the best!

I am no dr but I know about depression he sounds like he might need tough love not cruelty but love encourage him to continue with what he has worked hard for and just becasue that job did not work out it is no tthe last and he can do better if he puts his heart in it. Also tell him the side effects of the anti depression meds a lot of times only last until your body gets used to them.

I would try to convince him to see a psychiatrist, someone to talk to, and maybe they could convince him to try mediation, at the very least he needs someone to talk to , someone impartial, not you, a doctor

This depression is serious business, get him to the doctor, there are a lot of anti-depressants out there that are suitable without the bad side effects and it normally takes about two weeks for them to start working in your system

If he won't take the medication that will make him feel better and balance the chemicals in his brain, I don't know what to tell you. Have you discussed with him about maybe going inpatient at the hospital for a few days? If he won't and won't take his meds (I guess he won't see his psychiatrist??) then you and your husband need to discuss whether the two of you want to take care of him, in your home, long-term.

An option for you is to talk to your local department of social services. Just go to your county's website and they'll have a link. They can also help him--if he is willing--and help you, too. They may be able to find a group home for him to live in where they will keep an eye on him and provide him with medical/psychological care.

Best......

You can go to a doctor and do what is necessary in your state to get an involuntary commitment. He will probably tell you he hates you but that is better than going to his funeral because you did nothing.

beat him

The problem is that we are living in a world that has no
compassion.

I tell you that there are many people out there crying once in a while.
And that will include Statesmen and other personalities you may never think that they too suffer from emotional breakdowns.
Tell your son he should cheer up, be positive and he should not
seclude himself from others.
There are many people who are much worse off than his.
Tell him he should think about the misery in Iraq and how lucky
you are to have a family. And those who lost their homes during the bombing in Lebanon, losing everything they have.
There are many examples about hardship and his is really not that bad.

Then you might consider a change in profession and he
should think what other jobs he thinks he would like to carry
out.

He should join a club where he meets other people and interact with them.

But above all, my advice is : He should find god, and start humbling himself, if he never gave it a thought, let him do it NOW.

It works, god never refuses anyone who comes to him for help.
But before he gives he asks for humbleness and devotion.
And you cant cheat him, so you should be aware.

Repenting, praying will open up the link that will save your son.

An honest, open relationship with god will solve all your son's problem, believe it.

But should he chose to discard my advice, then his fate is uncertain.

Good luck

As a 35 year old anti-depressant user, I think you should take your son to his/your doctor and talk with him, the doctor, about the many new anti-depressants that are now available. I am currently taking Cymbalta and would highly reccomend that your son try it. There have been NO NEGATIVE side effects and I have been on it for almost a year now. Cymbalta even increases your body's production of Epinephren, which helps prevent physical pain and elevates your mood. I was 32 years old when I was first prescribed anti-depressants following the birth of my son when I was 31. Since I started taking them, I have often wondered why none of my doctors realized that I would have benefitted from them at a much earlier age. I have found the results amazing. Just be sure to tell your son that there are many different anti-depressants out there and that some probably will not be right for him. If he begins taking them and feels worse or has unpleasant side effects, he should tell his doctor immediately so that he can try a different one. I was on Prozac before and though it did help me tremendously, I didn't care for the side effects and switched to Cymbalta, which has been wonderful. If he is worried about the sexual side effects, you can tell him that my husband takes Cymbalta, also, and there have not been any negative side effects for him either. He should go to the doctor ASAP, before something tragic results from this instead of him getting the help he needs & having a wonderful future. It sounds to me like he is a very intelligent and extraordinary individual. It would be a shame to waste such a wonderful, gifted life because of depression. I KNOW FROM EXPERIENCE!!!!!!!!
GOOD LUCK & GOD BLESS!!!!!!!

Hi there, it sounds like form what I looked up on wickpedia about the Non-learning disorder
"Nonverbal Learning Disorder (NLD) (also known as NVLD) is a frequently misdiagnosed state of anxiety, confusion and social withdrawal caused by neurologically-based inabilities to send and receive common gestures, facial expressions and body-language cues. NLD persons may misread everyday nonverbal signals, display awkward body movements and have difficulty associating visual signs in space and time." tha it may be that in itselfe affecting his ability to rationalize his ability to deal with everything that is going on.

this put you in a very hard spot. You may have to step in, in a very uncomfortable way for his best sake. I think that he is definately in need of some consuling and due to his disabilities this may be a hard thing for him to say and to be able to get past.
good luck and god Speed
NIKKI(mom of 4 kids with Secial needs ages 14,13,11, and 5)

I feel for you and your son, but he need to see a therapist; like

psychologist or psychiatrist. I am suspect of the earlier diagnosis

since this kid went on to go into the reporting business. he must
have had some smarts as far as a learning disorder is concerned. but it seems he has sank into a depression. If that prescription doesn't work, or he is having side effects, there is more than one kind of drug. The doctor needs to try another one on him. But he needs help; depression that has dragged on too far can become life threatening.

one more thing, keep him lifted up in prayer.

Get him in to see a psycologist as they dont recomend meds and find out if there is an underlying factor that you are not aware of that might have bought this on. Be diplomatic when you approach him with any questions or comments and dont persecute him because you wont get a resolution

Get him back to the doctor. Some anti-d's work for some and not for others. The doctor should also be told about the NVLD. By doctor I mean MD psychiatrist who can prescribe meds or a good clinical PhD.