How is the best way to act and the best things to say, when your Girlfriend is in her BPD mood?

It seems like she hacks away at everything i say almost. When her disorder is kicking in. How do you handle a woman with this disorder. I'm learning, but i need more hints.

Once again, former question and advice. Go to your last couple of questions on this, my advice there will give you more of a detailed response. And one cannot be in a BPD mood. It's a personality disorder, that integrates itself into everything she does. Sorry. You can either ignore her, but that really isn't a relationship, or you can choose to listen to her for awhile, and then be there when she falls apart. I choose the second option because that what works for me and my boyfriend, but he's never left because of my BPD. As pissed as she is, and believe me, I know, she will eventually break, especially if you stick around for her whole rant and don't show any response. Then when she's upset, you can hold her, and tell her that you were listening, but you refuse to be brought down by her. That's something she won't completely understand, but the goal is to start communication with her. She may or may not apologize (I usually do at this point), but that's not the important part. The important thing is to get her through the episode, and move on so both of you can enjoy the other. In my last advice I offered you a book that may help, "Sometimes I Act Crazy", which offers advice to you as the significant other. I'm really pushing that book now, as well as my other advice involving that book, about marking the pages. Go read my last advice and the book, it'll hopefully help.

Try making her laugh. It always works for me when my friend does it when I'm in one of those moods haha.

Reassurance and space.
This is lifelong so you really need to accept things or decide you can't cope.
Nobody will judge you on your decision.

ignore her, don't fight with her, just let her rant.... agree with her, tell her she's right...just to avoid an argument.

We like conflict... well us with BPD.

if you are going to stay with her... you have just realize that what she says that hurts you is just that. she wants to hurt you, even though she doesn't mean it.... or it's not really an issue, she just needs to scream and yell and tell you how terrible you are....


you also have to realize she will torture herself just to get revenge, or make you feel like crap.... it's all part of the illness.

Avoiding conflict
While it is natural, for example, to avoid bringing up difficult topics with someone who is likely to get real upset, in failing to do she will often end up going along with things that make her unhappy. It is very important, however, to carry out this process of "observing one's own limits