I feel I can't take much more.things are so bad?

I just feel like I can't take anymore, my life is a total mess and I don't think its worth living,I went to university and was called a promising artist, but now years later I am coping with a terrible painful illness and need frequent medication, morphine, steroids, antibiotics and anti depressants, I am constantly ill and its like my boidy is falling apart[i have inflammatory bowel disease with huge ulcers that refuse to heal and bleed constantly]
my partner works for himself as he had an accident that broke his back and he can work when he has good days, but he's not been paid for months of work he's done, while I was in hospital,now he seems to be having some sort of breakdown, my 2 kids are crying constantly.also my house is a complete state as we were renovating an old property but with no money can't do anymore. I feel so alone and ashamed and don't feel things will get better, I am crying writing this so please only real advice,has anyone got any advice i would be grateful lol

Your story really hits me hard. Since I was 13 I've been struggling with depression.I'm 21 now and it seems like my life is a rollercoaster. I tried holding back the tears while reading your problem. Doesn't it seem that when one good thing happens five bad things follow it. I'm not a mother yet but I do know that your kids need you. You sound like a very strong woman, a lot stronger than you think you are I'm sure. I'm not going to tell you to look to god for answers, mainly because if you don't believe in that I don't want to offend you. You need help real bad. For the emotional issues, try seeking counsiling it helps even if it's just from friends and familiy. Also always remember that even though you have it rough right now one, things will change if you make them, and two there is always someone out there who has it worse than you so stay strong. As for the financial issues you can try getting financial assistance from the government. If for some reason you can't do that, try getting a loan to help you for a while. It only takes a few steps to make your life better, you just have to make it happen. Just remember, Your children need to see you being a strong awesome mother like they know you are. Life will fall into place, it might take some time but it will happen. Where there's a will there's a way. Good luck and if you need anyone to talk to I'm here.

I have no words for you, but come and your uncle T will give you a big hug.

wow, that it serious. Carry on with the anti-depressents, they'll help you feel better. Pray alot.
And it helps by thinking that maybe all this will be better in the future, and you wouldn't know without living.
I always say everything happens for a reason, even though thats sounds weird.
Maybe take your children to a psychologist, find out whats bothering them. You go as well. Therapist helps.

Lot's of Love
Redcherry_yummy <3

Your 2 kids are what need you to get through all this. Bless your heart! If you need a friend feel free to email me. I make a great shoulder to cry on. I wish there was something I could do to help!
When you are feeling down, and feel like life is not worth it... think of how much your kids need you! Maybe take out your sadness in the form of your art.
I wish you luck..... (BIG HUG)

is there no benefits or financial help you can get ?
i am at a loss of what to say honey , i feel for you i really do i wish i knew what would help . Luv and hugs to you all xx

Get professional counselling through your G.P. Your doctor cannot help unless you are totally honest with him/her. You seem to have serious reasons to feel this depressed and need help.

My heart goes out to you and your family. It must be real tough for you all.

I think you need to speak to your doctor about maybe getting some money from benefits. Perhaps your husband and you could get DLA. If you property is off a certain age, you may be elligable for a grant to help you get the work done.

Apart from that I dont have much else to offer you except my thoughts and prayers.

xx

I am so sorry for you but just want to tell you from experience that when you are at your lowest ebb things will take an unexpected turn for the better - keep painting try to pursue the art further, also your babies are crying constantly because they can sense their parents are unhappy, please try to lighten the atmosphere for them, is there no one who can help you financially or with the kids, what about your parents or in - laws, you cant carry on like this with the two of you coping on your own, please ask for help. Good luck and have a hug from me x.

Oh sweetheart there are people out there who are qualified to help you. Don't be scared when I say this but Social Services is probably your best bet. There's also your health visitor who can put you in touch with the right people too. Social Services helped me out loads when I was suicidally depressed. They put me in touch with a fantastic organisation called Sure Start who specialise in helping families who are struggling to cope for whatever reason. You don't say how old your children are but reading between the lines I guess they're quite young so have a little chat with their head teacher too. Depression doesn't help the healing process so you need to get some proper counselling too.

Generally my advice is get all the help available. They are helplines listed in the Phone Book. Get every conceivable help. Financial advice from the Citizens Advice Bureau will help solve your money worries, have another chat with your GP and if you don't get anywhere with him/her change your doctor. PLEASE believe me that things do get better and you have to believe that. Take each little bit of progress as a huge milestone. I had four children one of whom has special needs and I had no help. I was also ill much of the time and had very little help and support but I got in touch with Social Services and they helped me get back on the right road. They're not just there to take people's children away - there was never any mention of that with me and like you my house was in a mess and everything. Feel free to contact me privately if you feel you want to. I've been where you are but there is help available sweetheart and don't be afraid to ask for it.

You're going to need to find some help urgently, you won't find it on Y.A.
Both you and your partner are at a crunch point. Do you have family/friends that can help. If not phone the people below asap, like now.
To relieve some of your burden, you may need to consider selling your house, but they'll help you with your decisions.
Theres no shame in whats happening, but unless you act today, it may get worse.
Good luck and pick up that phone

OMG
Ok my mom had the same problem she tells me it all the time how my dad only worked for him self and they fighted all the time and she where really poor..

I dont have much advice but all i cant tell you is , it is tuff but stay in there and maybe you can have family members help u...

Annd.... Theres a movie called "The secret" you may not baleave it .. but its worth a look at..

make a list!!!!!! in your head or on a piece of paper!!! and deal with one thing at once, u obviously need a change in your antidepressants, as some can cause u 2 be worse than before u started them, seek councelling, there are all different types and it wouldnt hurt for u to go to 2 of them, u can do both at the same time, get your GP to refer you!!!! everything will get better, i promise you, dont think about ending it!!!! it will only pass the problems to another member of the family, and also create more, could u do that to them????? things will get easier............

i think i would be in the same state of mind if i had all these problems too but please don't give up, i know u may feel ashamed but you have no reason to, are there relatives or friends you can call on for help? if there are you really should that will take a load off...
maybe you should give up on developing this property, sell it as it is and get a home that u can live in and get better, have a talk with your kids (considering how old they r?) and try make them realise you really need their help in just behaving and maybe helping out a little, show them how serious you are and don't shout.
go to the docs and tell them that your not getting better! but don't let them fill you full of pills i dont belive that ever helps it jus causes another problem (side effects) which then need pills to sort them out and is never ending
you can always email me to talk to too
hope u get things on track

I am not sure if you believe in a higher being, but this is the time to do only what you can do and to give the rest to God.

My prayer for you:

Lord, please let your light shine down on this individual. Lord, she's in desperate need and your everlasting love, patience, and powerful healing can change everything. I pray that you guide her; show her the answers to give her hope - some breathing room to accept your love and grace so that she can be the great mother and partner she wants to be. Please God bless this woman and her family with the means to make their quality of life better as they look with yearning hearts to see better days. It is in your name, Jesus, that I pray. Amen.

If you need to hear some great words of advice, feel free to listen to the free weekly messages online from the church I attend in Minnesota: Eaglebrook Church (website listed below)

My sympathy. You really do have an awful lot on your plate. You do need practical help though. Do you have any relatives/friends/neighbours who could help out? Even just a bit of babysitting would take some of the load away. Have you got all the benefits you may be entitled to?
There is nothing to be ashamed of here. I cannot think of a soul who would be coping well under these circumstances. Accept any help on offer be it practical or emotional, nobody will think any the less of you for it and will probably be only to glad to be of assistance. Good luck, I wish you well.

If, what you write is as bad as you say then, what puzzles me is why you are not an in patient at one of the hospitals local to you.The conditions you have described particularly the reference to Morphine.I would have thought, qualified you for admission? then there is the question where are the social services .do they know of the situation you are in?what type of work does your boy friend do with a Broken Back? it must be a horrendous problem also for him, to continue this way good luck to you my friend. obviously you need help

Tabatha I am so sorry you are feeling like this today and I am sending a hug to you.
I am not suprised you feel the way you do with everything that has gone in in your life however there is hope and always will be.
You need to sort each problem out one at a time and not try and do it all at once as that is impossible for you or anyone.

Your husband is ill and works for himself this does not mean he can't ask for help from social security he is struggling to cope and worried sick about bills ect. He needs to go to doctor himself and get a sick note so he can claim some money for you all. This will ease the pressure of finance and give him some time to recover.
Your children are upset because children pick up on mom and dad's feelings is there a family member that can help you out here by having children for a while a few hours to take them out of house and give you all a break.?
I think you need to go back to your doctor and tell him everything you feel about yourself, husband and children. Your medication may need ajusting and he can find you some support to help you through this difficult time they are there to help.
House must be getting you down a lot so consentrate just on one room only your living room a place you can make comfy and cosy and relax in away from all the clutter of rest of house. This will make you feel a bit better if you have one place to go to that feels good.
You have nothing to feel ashamed of we all go through very bad patches some more than most have their fair share at it feels as if it all comes in one go. I have been there so I do understand but I found sorting one thing at a time helped a lot.
Please go back to doctor, have a word with childrens school to see how your children are at school they have support in most schools and if not will be able to put you in right direction. Go back to doctor yourself and finally see what financial help you can have being self employed does not mean you are not intitled to any.
I wish you well and if you need a chat email me ok. I hope I have helped a bit.

Oh my hunnie i feel for you so much, please dont dispaire i have very bad IBS and so can understand how you feel, its my kids that keep me strong. Please go to your g.p and tell them how your are feeling , as depression can come hand in hand with a serious illness. You MUST NOT feel ashamed hunnie,none of this is your fault, you just need some support and help to get you through this hard time, your G>p should be able to refer you to the right people to help. You can livewith this i promise you just need some way of coping day to day#
Thinking of you and sending you love xx

If you think you are getting all the practical help you can - don't forget the Samaritans for emotional support. They are not there just for the suicidal. They are good listeners.