Please help me learn to relax.?

I feel so low at the moment,and let life get me down so much.my husband is so calm and happy,i have 3 sons,and i feel so left out.
i have had major surgary,and now have an ileostomy,which does get me down.i am 42,but feel like a freak,and forty-ish.
why do i let life stress me out so much,and how can i learn to look in the mirror and like what i see.

calm down shut your eyes take deep breathes and be positive, tell yourself everything is going to be ok, if you have positive throughts the negetive throughts will not win.

You know I went through some difficult times in my life and felt the same way. But you know life is so short. It takes more energy to have negative feelings than it does to have positive feelings. I have lost loved ones in an instant. One day their here and the next they are gone. So I am fortunate to understand that you need to live each and every day to it's fullest. All the worrying in the world will not resolve a problem. And I finally decided for myself that if today were my last day, would I want to spend it feeling miserable or do I want to be able to enjoy it. The bottom line is that we all have the power to control what we think. When a negative thought comes into my mind I will literally tell myself that I am not going there. Then I replace it with a more pleasant thought. You wouldn't believe how such a simple little action can make such a big difference in your life. Also you have, what sounds to be, a loving husband and 3 loving sons. You are very fortunate in that respect. There are many people out there with no one to care about them. And your family loves you. There must be a reason for that. So if you want to be happier with what you see then start spreading love and joy. Help out someone that doesn't have the advantages you have. Spend some time talking with an older person that might be lonely. Help out a single mother with her kids. Donate things you don't use to Goodwill, The Salvation Army or food pantries. There are plenty of things needed out there that you could provide that not only would make you feel better about yourself but could make a world of a difference to someone else. On Answers alone I find many lonely & depressed people that just need a little positive influence. And 42 is still a young woman. You have many more years to get old. Don't rush it. It will creep up on you before you know it anyway. So get out there and make a difference in someone else's life and you will make a major change in your own.

get a bowflex, i got one, been as relaxed as ever