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What would be a good way to communicate with my Grandmother, who is now living in an hospice care facility.?


After accidentally falling, rushed to ER, surgery, recovery, rehabilitation, transferred from one place to another, surviving a couple of after-shock strokes, partially blind and unable to walk, eat or dress alone--my 86-year-young Grandmother seems more like a zombie. She rarely recognizes anyone.

I understand how difficult it is to visit when it doesn't seem like your grandmother is really there. She's not the person you knew before. I believe that people feel your presence even though they may not respond. If you could visit her and talk, perhaps about things you did in the past or what you are doing now her spirit will know that you are with her. Try reading a book to her that might make the visit the little more easy For you.

Best wishes,
Billie77

john edwards or sylvia brown might be able to help

Maybe you can bring a small music tape deck-radio? play her favorites or the MPR channels for her. That may help her brain connect the dots...to you in the room. The worst thing you could do ---is nothing. So, stay in the game. You may also want to start giving her A B-Complex Vitamin for brain funtion and Potassium (99mg) tablets. Loss of Potassium can make anyone any age comatose...and in fatc you can die if Potassium levels get too low. Vitmain C for blood circulation will aid against stroke too. You're a good girl for asking this question!

When you go and visit her, talk to her like she can understand you. After strokes they are sometimes just trapped in a non reacting body but know what is going on. So just talk to her and you will soothe her.

I suggest you talk with her, touch her, play music you know she enjoys. Be with her if you can. There have been recent studies released showing new evidence of brain activity in people once thought to be brain dead. There is also the spiritual realm to consider. Trust that your connection continues and she is aware of you at some level.

Love is very powerful! If you can get over to see your grandma, then hold her hands and talk to her.. tell her you love her and laugh and talk about the good things you remember. She will know it even she doesnt seem to. She might get tired fast, so be sensitive to that.
If you are far from her, then pray for her..she will know it on a spiritual level, and it will help you to feel closer to her, too. It really will. Ask the people who care for her to tell grandma that you are praying for her and thinking of her and to mention your name to her often . You can talk to the staff and give them some good things you remember about your grandma's life to talk to her about. Even if she doesnt seem to understand, they would probably be more than happy to be able to chat when they are with her about things she might recall. It might help her feel comfortable and happy, and that can be a gift to her from you. Studies have been done indicating that people who are incapacitated feel higher morale when they know someone is thinking of them and praying for them. Your grandmother has someone to love her and that is a wonderful thing. Thank you for being that kind of person, and know that you are doing your best.

My grandfather had a stroke 9 years ago and cannot speak--all that comes out is "baba ba ba ba" but I can still sit with him and kinda guess what he's trying to say--I did have 20 years with him before the stroke! He truly enjoys it when I come in, he takes me to see the fish tank every time. It's hard to see him unable to walk, talk, and take care of himself (he's in his mid 60s now) but I still cherish the time we have left. It'll be rough but please continue to go see your grandmother, you will be able to notice if something's wrong with her care.

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