Is there such a thing as delayed grief? (please read details)?

last may my mother died on the friday before mothers day. I am a 36 year old male and i was a big mommas boy. I took it pretty hard. Then a few months later Katrina came along and took my home. I have been so busy with survival that I kinda put my grief on the back burner for a while. Now that I am back on my feet, I think about my mom evryday. I cry, and wish she were here all the time. I am so depressed. What should I do. Also, I am always irritable, I always want to sleep. On top of that I feel like no one cares. Please help

Yes - you are grieving and you are depressed. Normal feelings for what you have gone through. Neither of those events is easy to handle.

You are depressed - the irritabiloity, crying, and wanting to sleep a lot are all signs. If you have health insurance, call them up and get in to see a counselor - that way you can work through your grief. If you don't call your county office, the red cross, etc for help - there are resources out there and they can help you use them. If you belong to a church you can turn for help there.

It may feel like you are alone and no one cares, but this is not true. Working with a counselor to deal with you grief will help. Getting up every day and working or voluneering someone will help.

Good luck. You will be fine. There is help out there for you - and it isn't easy to ask for when you feel like you do, but once you do, everything will get better - I promise.

Yes, I experienced it when my dad passed on.

You could say "Yes". It is called Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome. It can happen to anybody who experiences a life changing trauma, not just soldiers returning from war. Ic can be from one or two serious events or a series of lessor stresses over a long period of time.

See a counselor that specializes in PTSD and Depression. Steer clear of alcohol, drugs, and other "crutches". The depression and grief are part of your mind's way of finally dealing with it.

A good book that can reference is ODYSSEUS IN AMERICA, by Dr. Johnathan Shay MD/PhD.

yes there is. I lost my best friend who i loved very much. I still cry and it's been 2 1/2 yrs. it's ok though. I know how hard it is. Everyone does. All you can do is think about all the good times you've shared together. MEMORIES!!!

Yes, such a thing does exist...
Although I didn't lose a close family member or home like you (I'm very sorry to read that), I had lost other "things" that were precious to me and I loved a lot...My African grey parrot who was only 3 years old when got lost (they live up to 100 years old, it was like a child to me even if this sounds ridiculous). I lost 2 other pets, one was poisoned by my viscious neighbour, another one...who knows-just dissapeared. I lost a man whom I loved so much, sooo much...Although my loss doesn't even compare to yours, I know the pain that comes with it.
Months after all this I would do lots of drugs and drink myself unconscious... I guess it helped a little because I was about to go insane.

But now I know that God tests us in such cruel ways to make us strong. I wouldn't blame you if you doubt in God's love or even his existence- I did. But I went through the pain, depression, substance abuse and finally I saw the light. Loss is a part of life and we have to learn to accept it, no matter how terrible it is, no matter how much it hurts. After night, there always comes day, after winter-there always comes spring and I believe that your life has beautiful moments waiting for you in your future...Just be strong. It's just a test- pass it. I'm sure your mother is always with you, you just can't see her...Talk to her, she'll show you signs that she's there watching over you.

I think you have it pegged - you put your grief on the back burner because your survival was your priority. Check out Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs and you will see that until your survival is secure, everything else is put on hold. You are now probably going through a normal grieving process. Hang in there, it will get better.