My cat died in my arms. I'm so overwhelmed with grief, it's literally devestating. How to cope?

Well since I might have a lil case of depression, my loss of my 6 month old kitten just an hour ago...really blew it off the edge for me. She was like my lil support system and buddy. She was FeLV+, adopted her when she wad 1 month old, she was born with it. She prob died due to complications from that, but too her to the vet often for her treatments.

I keep crying and crying...this even gets to the point where I feel more worthless than ever...like I love her sooo much....but feel some sort of guilt. Is this normal? Maybe I need to see a grief specialist.

AND PEOPLE: dont tell me "it was just a cat...get over it"...she was more like a human sister to me.

Thanks to everyone's support.
To HTown4Life: would you say that to your kid if he died: Oh he's just a kid they can be replaced. Because my kitten was like my own sister. Animals are living beings too, not objects

An hour ago.....give yourself a little time. Sorry for your loss. I wish I could cry like that. I've lost ppl close to me and nver really had a sob over it. I've never really had the grief. I cant even relate to that kind of grief but all I can suggest is time.

similar thing happned to me hun,its not easy,but the best thing to do is cry,let out all the built up emotions,all the hurt your feeling.its not your fault, please remember that you did your best for your cat, and she knows that.it will take time,but you will feel better. goodluck *hugs*

Oh my gosh - I am so sorry for your loss. Death is a part of life and I think the reason animals have such a short life span is because they are so special that it can not be sustained over a human life time.
I know I lost two dogs at the age of 7 nearly 6 years ago now and I still cry if I think about it too much. I have two dogs and a cat now and I was crapping myself when the oldest one turned 7 recently. I think I will need professional help and medication when the next one dies.
You have done the right thing by asking and talking about it, but lean on your friends and family if you can to.
The hurt will ease over time.

of course, its not just a cat. if i were to lose something that i treasure so much to a point, i'd be sad as well. it'll be hard for you to get over it but really. if your cat was a big support for you and was like a sister to you, than you should keep her that way. if her death brings you down too much, than she'll be just hurting you now. at least get better for her sake if she meant that much to you D:

Sorry to hear of your loss.
kittens are very good companions and you lost yours.
I won't tell you to get over it cause I know you will.
This will be in your own time though.
Grieve for as long as you like and when you are ready you will see this as a special time. A special chapter of your life book which you close temporarily so you can function without despair. Try and keep your chin up honey, and please accept a hug from me.

Try not to think off her. I Have a cat called Rory. My first pet and i would hate to see him die. so i try not to think about him dieing. sometimes getting a new pet resolves the pain.but it can also make it worse because that pet could die too. my cousins dog died a few days ago but he has 2. but that doesn't matter because he still Miss's little smurf. i think he is getting new one.so all i have to actually say is.try as hard as you can to forget about. good luck! :)

no it wasn't just a cat, it was a being you were hoping you could help. I can only imagine your pain, and doing so fills me with so much sorrow for you. Don't take it as a personal failure, you most likely did all you could. At the very least take comfort in the fact that instead of dying alone that cat had the comfort in dying in the arms of someone who loved it very much and will remember it. I'm so sorry to hear of this pain your experiencing, please try to find some strength in the fact that you were a "shepherd" to ease the process in going to the other side.

I'm not really sure what to say to make it better.. but I wanted to express my remorse and say that I have been there also. It's the sad part of loving something.. when it's taken from you. I really do wish you the best.

awww poor u.....
i feel sorry for your great loss :`(

I am so sorry.

Losing a pet can feel the same as losing a human family member. But just remember it is not your fault she was born with a illness. Let your self cry a good cry grieving is normal and healthy. But don't blame your self. You loved her and took care of her. You need to take care of your self and be strong for you. You matter.

Allow yourself to grieve for a while.
Love is like that!
Be proud that you gave her as good a life as you could and were there for her until the very end.
Many cats who have that are not so lucky to have had as much care and attention as she did. You can at least rest easy that you did your best for her.
I hope someday you can get a new pet to share your kind heart with.

Sorry to hear about your loss. I have had similar experiences with my cats in the past and it is hard to get over. Just let the grief process go on and cry. Just remember that your friend did not die alone, you were with her in the end and from your arms to Gods hands. I believe you will see you friend again in heaven. Pray that God comforts your kitten until you get there to be with her yourself. I do not put GOD into a box, GOD can do anything and give a soul to anything. Bless you!!

aww im very sad to hear this. a couple of month ago i had lost a cat to. he was special. and something strated to happen with his jaw. he couldnt chew. i use to hold him and listen to music so he could sleep. i took him to the vet and a couple days later i became sick myself. later that day i had a phone call that he had passed. i was devestated. he was my best friend. and he just left me. i was soo mad at life and everything in it. i cried for weeks. people say it takes time. i disagree i never got over it. but i did have to learn that death does happen. and we need to accept it. but i think about him all the time. and i hope that you will soon be able to cope with this trajedy. but again i am sorry, just thought i would share my story.

I am so sorry to hear of your loss and, understandably you are very upset and will continue to be upset for a while.
Please remember that you adopted a very young but sick cat and you gave it love and tenderness; you cared for it and arranged treatment for it. Above all from the moment you brought her home you have been there for her - and she experienced love and caring, which she may not have done if you had not been there for her.
Of course you will feel bad but it will pass as you start to remember the good times you had together for a few months.
There are many cats who need the love you can provide and, one day soon, adopt another needy cat and change their lives, too.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know better than anyone that losing a pet can be just as horrible as losing a family member. I also had a cat that died in my arms, and I was so close to him that it felt like a part of me was gone. I still have his brother cat, whom I love very much, and sometimes seeing him reminds me so much of his brother who died... It's very tough, and I don't know if I will ever be able to think about him without feeling sad and missing him so much.

I'm not sure what you can do to get over it, I would never ever tell you to just "forget about it" because I know for most people it's impossible, and not even healthy. The best I can say is to always remember how happy your kitty made you while you had her, and that it wasn't your fault. I also felt guilt about my cat dying, I think it's natural.

If you start to feel worse and worse then maybe you should see a grief counselor. But I hope you feel better, I know it's horribly tough in times like these.

u right
any animal living with the family is just a family member and u just not believe when they go it seems that family member gone
but why u restless and depressed
just think that she died in your arms
what if she died somehwre else and not near you
its good that she died right in your arms
everyone is not so lucky like you
so just cheer up as everybody dies sooner or later
take care

I know it is so insensitive to say get another little kitty ,but maybe you can give another kitty a loving home and learn to love her as much as your lost friend. I'm sure the kitty would understand and want this.There are many kitties who need love.They can never replace a friend but you can make a new friend. Maybe your love for this kitty was meant to show you that there is another kitty that needs to be rescued.

I am so very very sorry about your special kitten who gave you much joy as well as you bringing the same to her. Our family went through the same thing as we had ours for almost 18 years and no children for 7 years before. Our baby went everywhere with us...trips and hidden out in a special carrier that looked like a bowling bag in restaurants and malls. No one knew she was everywhere with us.

Then our child came along. I had her declawed later in life to protect our child. Instead, our baby became a toddler and our kitty had to be saved from him! We used a baby gate for our sweet kitty to jump over to escape from our child!

When our son was 11, she went to a cat vet and wasn't sure what was wrong. After that it was a specialist care place where they didn't build her up and gave her too much anethesia! The vet specialist made us go home early! He'd call to give us progress notes and still say they were doing these biopsies overtaxing her system. Then he said he couldn't wake her up and pronounced her as going off all support not even letting us come to her to hear our voice or give our permission to do so! They charged us $1500. Biopsies showed nothing a week later! The vet doing the surgery got fired.

We were devastated. Our son was 11 and went into himself almost not coming out of it! He just lay on the couch with no expression. We took him to his youth pastor who was able to get through to him.


Next we had to make a decision about what to do for our kitty.
They gave her frozen body to us in a box wrapped in news paper and plastic!!! We discussed as a family what we wanted to do. We bought a powder blue container with a matching pillow for the backyard lot. Before we did our baby's burial, we discussed we wanted to open up the box and paper and get the horrible plastic off her. I said she was not going to look like our baby and not sewn up and would be pretty bad. But we all wanted to hold her and cry and talk to her and say we were sorry we let this happen to her. It helped alot! We had our own little service over her.

We thought we would never get a cat again. We couldn't handle another loss. Almost 2 years later we ran into a cat showing area with a lady who cares for those not wanted or left in houses abandoned with 100's of cats. We learned about aids in cats and other illnesses of those who roam free.
We decided to fill out pre-adoption papers. We had a home visit with Siamese kittens of different kinds. We fell in love with 2 of them...1st cousins with birthdays a week apart. This lady sent from the east coast to the west coast those like your special kitten to a lady who cared for them until God took them. To make sure ours weren't infected they were tested 3 times and kept until they were 3 months old. We've had them 10 years this coming August. I know we won't have them for too many years from now. Mine thinks I am his mama and has to be clingy with me. I spoiled mine too much. My son's thinks she is his girlfriend! We were able to love again but it took time. God needed another special family to care for these new ones, and we were it.

Treasure all those memories. I admire you for caring for a kitten with FeLV+ as you had courage and a heart of love for one kitten with a short life span. Your kitten felt your love. She knew you kept her with a vet to keep her healthy as long as she was here. Someday you will see her again.

What you are feeling is VERY normal. We went through our guilt thinking if only we never left her there or went there. If only we could have been given the chance to talk to her before they stopped warming her body as she was alone in a strange place without us. Treasure the time you had and knowing she was in your arms happy. Cry for her. Take the time to grieve, but at the same time remember her and the joy you both felt. That's what she would want. In time, she will want you to love again...BUT give it plenty of time to feel ready again. You will be okay again. That's what she wants as she knew there will be another that needs you one day. Talk about her to others.

I wish the best for you
Mrs. Hez

Sarah, I'm so sorry for your loss. Pets are like are babies and It's okay to feel the way your feeling, it's way to soon. I lost my cat to kidney failure on December 19th 2007 her name was Asia she was 15 years old and my best friend. I still cry because I miss her. I hope you feel better soon!! Take Care

It's just a cat come on now,you can replace them like a car.

It's absolutely normal to feel like this about your kitten and it shows what a wonderfully caring person you are

It is very recent.

Give yourself time

so sorry to hear that...

get another one and pretend its her...