I have genital herpes and I am seeking support and advice from others. Can anyone help me?

I found out that I have genital herpes a few months ago. I'm very emotional about it and I don't how to deal with it. I'm concerned with how this will affect my life. I'm single but I desire to be married and have a family someday and I feel like people would run once they knew that I have GH. I don't want to give herpes to anyone, yet I want to get married someday and have a healthy sex life. I need direction, help, and comfort right now. I know I can't change the facts but I need to come to terms with this and not cry when I talk about it. What support is available? What do support groups have to offer? What can you suggest that I do to answer questions I have? What type of sex life can I expect now that I have herpes? I don't want to spread this disease. Can I get pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy without spreading herpes? Any direction and/or advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you to all who read and reach out to me, I really appreciate it.

There is no question that this is a diagnosis that no one is happy about receiving. It sucks, but it does get better. The first think you need to remember is to not let herpes define who you are. It is just a virus and in the grand scheme of things, it is far less of an issue in a relationship that a lot of other baggage that exists out there.

When I found out I had herpes I was in shock. I never slept around and have had far fewer partners that anyone else I know. How could that happen to me? It was like I had a big sign over my head that told everyone that *I* was the one. But since then I have found out that there are so many of us out there! Between 25- 40% of the population has genital herpes! We are everywhere! No one can tell who we are, and those who love us see it for what it is. Just a minor inconvenience from time to time, but nothing more.

Yes, of course you can get married, have a healthy sex life, and have children. My husband is h- and it makes no difference to him if I have it. Over 25% of all babies born in the US are born to mothers with genital herpes. So that is not an issue.

There are ways to avoid spreading the virus, but it is also possible that you will find someone who already has it. You did not say what type you have, but as many as 90% of the population has type 1 herpes. If that is what you have, then chances are you do not need to worry about spreading it anyway. Those who reject you for having herpes are probably not worth being in your life anyway. Decent people will see you for who you are, and not focus on the virus that is no more than a cold sore.

A really good on line support group is located at http://www.racoon.com/herpes/index.html

hi, welcome to the club. not that we wanted to be members but it helps to know you are not alone, i was diagnosed with herpes about a year and a half ago. i caught it from my ex-boyfriend in year 3 of our relationship. i never thought i would get an STD. I never slept around. My ex was my 2nd partner. I wore condoms and this still happened. I was naturally devastated when i found out. I cried about it a lot. I dumped my ex and i havent dated anyone since for two reasons: i dont really trust people anymore and i am afraid of people judging me. I want to be married on day and have kids two. My doctor assures me I can have healthy kids. If i have an outbreak during labor, a c-section will be performed. I am currently looking for a support group. I think it would help to meet other people in the same situation. I know there are dating websites for people with herpes but I am not the "online dating" type. So for now I am just working on being the best me I can be (physically, mentally, and spiritually). Hopefully I will learn to trust again but until then I need to be alone. I know it sucks having herpes but look at it this way. It is not HIV, AIDS or cancer. If herpes is the worst thing that happens to me life can still be good. Hope I helped.

I was diagnosed as having genital herpes 10 years ago, amazingly enough I contacted it through receiving oral sex from a guy with a cold sore so readers beware you don't need to have intercourse. The first outbreak was terrible but mostly due to the flu like symptoms I suffered from. I felt very isolated and stigmatised and I suppose I still do. Since this first attack I haven't been aware of another outbreak so if there has been one it wasn't bad enough for me to notice. I have had two children in the last 7 years and it didn't effect my pregnancies at all though if you have an outbreak while your delivering your baby it could be passed on to the baby but only in a vaginal delivery obviously! but even then not to worry because this is easily cleared up. I do understand how you feel but once you get over the stigma you'll be fine. Another thing you can only pass the virus on if you have an outbreak, but if you use condoms you should be fine, and you don't have to tell every guy you sleep with only if you feel comfortable and it's a long term thing. One more thing don't be ashamed and don't label yourself you may never get another outbreak and if you do at least it's something treatable and not hiv.

I too felt just like you are feeling now when I was diagnosed. However in the last 5 years the episodes have become less. I do suffer more in summer and when I am stressed. I know when I am going to have an episode as I tingle right the way down to my feet, get achy and head ache as well as the obvious. Outbreaks only last max 10 days and do clear up quicker in time. You will be able to have babies, if you are suffering at the time of labour you may be advised to have a C Section.

Don't despair life does go on. There are lots of websites and some are a bit conflicting. Taking minerals is meant to help, I have not tried it. I had been a carrier for many years before I had my first episode and was happily married at that time. My husband has never had any symptoms and it is possible he passed it on to me. However you will know when you are infected and will not want contact.

There are worst things that you could be diagnosed with, that is what I tell myself. My heart does go out to you, but you will be fine.

Ask your local STD Clinic if you can talk to their counsellor.

Visit these website and do a Yahoo!Search on Herpes.
www.Herpes.com, www.ashastd.org, Positivesingles.com, www.niaid.nih.gov/factsheets/stdherp.htm... http://dir.yahoo.com/Health/Diseases_and...