How do you find out for sure if somebody is guilty of elder abuse when you live in a different state?

My sister is my moms in home health care provider and in the past few years my brothers and I believe that she has been taking advantage of my mom financially and emotionally. My mom no longer talks to any of us any more and we have no way to really check up on her. My daughter (then 17) visited out there this year for several months and says that my sister is always yelling bad things at my mom like "You would be happy if I just killed myself? I should just kill myself!" (My sister has slashed her wrists and done a couple of other things that could be perceived as suicide attempts in the past.) My daughter said that my sister very seldomly get s off of the computer and that when my mom says that she is hungry my sister does not cook for her. My Mom is on dialysis 3 days a week, is 64 years old, and has been in bad health for a while. My brothers and I do not know what to do and and suspect my sister of abuse, although not physical. What should we do?

If your mother is receiving Social Security benefits, contact your nearest office. They will forward your information to the office which services your mother's address.

You can also contact the welfare office which has jurisdiction over your mother's address. Ask for adult protective services & tell them about your suspicions. I'm not familiar with how the welfare offices work, but maybe your local office will forward information to the proper office.

Doing both of the above will take care of the problem. I do know that the welfare office sends someone to the home.

When I worked for Social Security I often contacted Adult Protective Services.

Contact the police or sheriffs dept in the town/ city where your mom lives and ask them to do a WELFARE CHECK, due to inability to make contact on your own and a health risk is involved. They will go to her residence and ask to see and speak to your mom and then you have to contact them to find out what her condition was. They will not contact you if your mom doesn't want them too . Hope this helps.