Parents getting a divorce..I dont feel anything whats wrong with me?

A NASTY divorce. My dad cheated on my mom. There is screaming and fighting every day...and yet I feel like I dont feel...anything. I dont get sad or cry in front of them. I feel as though its not bothering me at all...

But then, when I talk to my councellor or a teacher, tears come streaming out.

Am I becoming some kind of unemotional freak or am i stuffing my emotions. What is going on???

Im 16 by the way. I also feel kind of numb, like I cant feel love even tho I know I love the person.

You are just numb in front of them because you are bewildered and don't know how to re-act. Also you know they are so wrapped up in their fighting, you feel invisible. I am glad you are talking with someone. This must be an extremely hard time for you. I am sorry that adults make these kinds of mistakes, but we all do sometimes. good luck

i dont know if u could sort out all of your emotions while in front of ur parents, its prob just too much to handle right then

its hard to explain but i know how you feel. when you lose something important to you or something bad happens its pretty normal to feel numb or like you have no emotions. thats how i am, too. different people deal with emotional pain in different ways so i definetly wouldnt consider you an "emotioial freak." if you are anything like me this is how you deal with anger or frustration. when i get mad at someone i love i dont yell or fight with them i stay quiet and pretend it doesnt bother me. my suggestion would be to talk to them about it if you havent already. let them know how you feel and i hope they understand. i am very sorry, by the way. good luck to you

It sounds like you're protecting your sanity by constructing a barricade of indifference. Behind that wall, you can be safe from the arguments, the rage, the feelings of betrayal and loss that naturally accompany the breakup of a family.

It works great, except that you end up cutting yourself off from all the emotions you WANT to feel, like love for each of your parents.

If you are able to express the appropriate emotions with a counsellor, or with another "safe" person, then your defense mechanism is reasonably under control. As your mind begins to accept the inevitability of the divorce, I'll bet you will be able to access appropriate emotions in the home environment as well. Good luck, and God bless!

You're in a state of emotional shock...the mind is a wonderful thing. When something becomes too painful, the brain automatically shuts down any pain receptors. This is true with emotional pain as well as physical pain.

When talking about it, however, it's a different story. You are bothered by it when it is not there because it is not causing you pain AT THAT MOMENT. Your parents are not fighting directly in front of you, so the mind hasn't dulled it at all.

Talk to your parents about how this is affecting you. You might want to keep talking to your counselor as well. I've been there, I know how you feel. Good luck!

There is nothing wrong with you. You are engaged in dissociation, a natural defense mechanism of the mind. Please explore the link below. I am confident you will find it enlightening.