Advice on dementia?

we are getting worried that my nan has dementia - she phones up to 10 times a day asking the same questions about where me, my mum and my dad are living (as we all live separately) and keeps asking me where I work, she forgets things she was told minutes ago but can remember things from the distant past. Her local vicar rang us a few weeks ago to say he has found her wandering around the village as she had forgetten where she was going. We have taken her to her GP and they arranged an old age psychologist who specialises in memory to see her. They gave her a 30 question test and said she scored quite well on it, and said she may have mild dementia but they weren't going to take it any further. Since my grandad died she can't deal with her bills and stuff as she never has done, so we are doing them, but basically she can take care of herself and goes to see her friends locally etc - any advice on what we should do next would be very much appreciated.

Noora - that is the most ridiculous answer I have ever seen on here, and that's saying something.

This sounds very familiar to our own family circumstances. I am not a medic by any means, but your nan sounds at the minute, "confused". You should keep a careful eye on her, tackle the doctor again, and insist on being allowed to see and speak to a social worker.They will then and should give you guidance, and maybe offer a care in the community package. Unfortunately if you are in the uk, you will have to pursue this yourself, as the Health Service is not as it was regarding the elderly. Good luck. I haven't mentioned age, as this is immaterial, unfortunately dementia, confusion etc can strike any time in later years.

Sounds like alzhimers

She needs a risk assessment done. If the vicar has found her roaming the streets, you have enough evidence to support your claim disregard how many she scored out of 30. Don't take their answer as been final, re-visit her GP and supply your evidence. She should not be left on her own as she is a risk not only to herself but to motorists too. The problem is with authorities is that they decline to act constructively, then went a hazard arises they will implement excuses referring to the mental test. They evade any responsibility by their methods. I know because my mother is in the same situation whereby she kept having falls. She finally broke her hip and cost the NHS more to make a recovery in hospital.
Don't take no for an answer. Get a second opinion.

you all need a geriatric specialist--someone who specializes in exactly this. this person is usually a social worker or a registered nurse who has his or her own business. look in the phone book or ask your nan's doctor if they recommend someone in particular. you can even sometimes go to assisted living centers for the elderly and they should have clients there. ask at the front desk if they can recommend someone.
arrange a business meeting with this person (unfortunately in america it is not a free service). they will want to meet your nan and you and your parents to see what the next few moves should be. they can help bring someone in (like a nurse) to see your nan every day and help her take her daily medicines and arrange doctors appts and help her write checks.
eventually, they will make you a plan--a 3 month plan, a 6 month plan and a 1-2 year plan on what they think should happen to nan. of course, your nan has every right to voice her concerns and opinions.
your nan needs some help. this is really REALLY common. my mother in law lost 2 sisters and her husband within 6 months of each other. she was 80 when it happened. she became depressed and just sort of fell apart. same thing--could remember what she wore on her first date with my father in law but can't remember if she even ate breakfast now, 5 years later, she is in assisted living and doing a lot better with her dementia. someone cares forher, she has lots of friends and she eats 3 times a day. before, she couldn't even remember to do that for herself poor thing.
keep us posted. good luck.
xo

Noora, thanks for the enlightening input....I am sure all of us benefited form it in some way.....oh, wait, no we didn't.
Anyhow, My Grandfather suffered from dementia, and Grandma suffered from Alzheimer's. Every once and a while there were similarities in the conditions. For both my Grandpa and Grandma we sat down as a family and talked about what our options were. A nursing home, family taking turns caring for her, live in nurse? For my Grandpa, we chose all took turns caring for him. For Grandma she ended up being so bad she had to go into a home. If you can, I really suggest a live in nurse if your family can afford it.
best wishes to you and your family.

Hi, unfortunately, I think this could be a mild form of Alzheimers disease. Im not trying to diagnose or anything, but that is kind of what it sounds like, I'm sorry.Alzheimer's disease is the most common cause of dementia, which is the loss of intellectual and social abilities severe enough to interfere with daily functioning. Dementia occurs in people with Alzheimer's disease because healthy brain tissue degenerates, causing a steady decline in memory and mental abilities.

About 4 million older Americans have Alzheimer's, a disease that usually develops in people age 65 or older. This number is expected to triple by the year 2050 as the population ages.

Although there's no cure for Alzheimer's disease, researchers have made progress. Treatments are available that improve the quality of life for some people with Alzheimer's. Also, more drugs are being studied, and scientists have discovered several genes associated with Alzheimer's, which may lead to new treatments to block progression of this complex disease.

In the meantime, caring for someone with Alzheimer's takes patience and a focus on the things a person can still do and enjoy. Those with Alzheimer's 鈥?as well as those who care for them 鈥?need support and affection from friends and family to cope.


Everyone has occasional lapses in memory. It's normal to forget the names of people whom you rarely see. But it's not a normal part of aging to forget the names of familiar people and objects.

Alzheimer's disease 鈥?a progressive, degenerative brain disease 鈥?causes more than simple forgetfulness. It may start with slight memory loss and confusion, but it eventually leads to irreversible mental impairment that destroys a person's ability to remember, reason, learn and imagine.

Most people with Alzheimer's share certain signs and symptoms of the disease. These may include:

~Increasing and persistent forgetfulness. At its onset, Alzheimer's disease is marked by periods of forgetfulness, especially of recent events or simple directions. But what begins as mild forgetfulness persists and worsens. People with Alzheimer's may repeat things and forget conversations or appointments. They routinely misplace things, often putting them in illogical locations. They frequently forget names, and eventually, they may forget the names of family members and everyday objects.

~Difficulties with abstract thinking. People with Alzheimer's may initially have trouble balancing their checkbook, a problem that progresses to trouble recognizing and dealing with numbers.

~Difficulty finding the right word. It may be a challenge for those with Alzheimer's to find the right words to express thoughts or even follow conversations. Eventually, reading and writing also are affected.

~Disorientation. People with Alzheimer's often lose their sense of time and dates, and may find themselves lost in familiar surroundings.

~Loss of judgment. Solving everyday problems, such as knowing what to do if food on the stove is burning, becomes increasingly difficult, eventually impossible. Alzheimer's is characterized by greater difficulty in doing things that require planning, decision making and judgment.

~Difficulty performing familiar tasks. Once-routine tasks that require sequential steps, such as cooking, become a struggle as the disease progresses. Eventually, people with advanced Alzheimer's may forget how to do even the most basic things.

~Personality changes. People with Alzheimer's may exhibit mood swings. They may express distrust in others, show increased stubbornness and withdraw socially. Early on, this may be a response to the frustration they feel as they notice uncontrollable changes in their memory. Depression often coexists with Alzheimer's disease. Restlessness also is a common sign. As the disease progresses, people with Alzheimer's may become anxious or aggressive and behave inappropriately.

Because early Alzheimer's symptoms progress slowly, diagnosis is often delayed. People developing the condition may be frighteningly aware of their problems 鈥?but careful to keep them hidden, refusing to see a doctor. As a result, even their families may fail to see what's going on. When the signs and symptoms are too obvious to miss, those closest to the person often realize that similar 鈥?but less severe 鈥?difficulties have been present for years.

The disease's course varies from person to person. Eight years is the average length of time from diagnosis of Alzheimer's to death. Survival begins to decline three years after diagnosis, but some people live more than a decade with the disease.

***Many people with Alzheimer's and their families benefit from counseling or local support groups. Contact your local Alzheimer's Association affiliate to get connected with support groups, doctors, resources and referrals, home care agencies, supervised living facilities, a telephone help line, and educational seminars. *** Best of Luck & Take Care! =]

It sounds like early stage Alzheimer's. I work in a nursing home and unfortunately I see it all to often. She is probably ringing you all because she cant remember things and is trying to put her mind straight. The best thing to do is ask social services for abit of help. For example panic buttons and such like. Or if possible try and ask to live with one of you or your family. I'm really sorry for you. It must be awful to see someone you love like that. Good luck hun xxxxxx

um basically what im hearing is your afraid she will die
guess what she's gonna die
so are you
so am i
deal with it and just spend all you got left with her
live each day to fullest