I think my boyfriends father is developing a form of dementia but he's in denial?

His father has been showing signs of memory loss and other symptoms of dementia (I won't go into detail) I sense something is wrong and I've seen a decline and he refuses to talk about it even when I mention what I've noticed. He chalks it up to "brain farts" and he says we all have them but I know what is father is having it not "brain farts" His family does not talk openly about a lot of things and I'm pretty sure this is one of them. I've been his shoulder to lean on for as long as I can remember so I'm positive he would tell me if something was going on. I think he knows something is wrong but he's in denial just by the way he responds to it when I bring it up (which isn't often because I know it makes him uncomfortable) I've contacted the Alzheimer's Society for info on the disease and other related dementias but I've yet to show him the info. I'm worried that his family will wait too long and they won't get the services and support that his father will need.

Is there anything I can say or do to convince my boyfriend to at least go get his Dad checked out. He hasn't been to the doctors yet because nothing is wrong....but I think everyone is just in denial.

I would sit down with your boyfriend and show him the information you have received from the Alzheimers Society. Explain to him in a non-threatening way that you have concerns about the changes you have seen occur in his father. Tell him that you would be happy to accompany them to the doctor's appointment, just so the doctor can check on his father's current status and that if the doctor says there is nothing going on with his father you will drop the matter entirely. If as you say, his father is deteriorating, it will show in the mini mental exam the doctor will give to his father. This will determine to what degree if indeed he does have dementia. I know what you are going through as I just recently went thru the same thing with my husband's mum. No one would believe me, even her doctor at first. Then she started misplacing money and telling tall stories she believed to be true about her family creating all kinds of havoc. People think it is easy caring for someone with dementia, but it isn't. You must be on your guard 23/7 to keep them safe and injury free. The most simple things around the house can turn into something that creates a large problem. Good luck to you and I hope your boyfriend will listen to you. The sooner his father is diagnosed, the better for all concerned.

you can lay the brochure where he can see it and let him browse at it when he is ready and let hi ponder over it and he just might see what you are seeing.

I'd go against the "lay the brochure where he can see it" idea; Your bf's just going to see that as going behind his back if he doesn't want to discuss it. If your going to show it to him, do it to his face with some conviction.

Facing this kind of thing is very difficult. Acceptance and resignation take time. Don't try to force it on him. You already know that his family doesn't talk openly about a lot of things and this is just one more thing they may never talk openly about. I like the suggestion that you leave the information out in the open. Of course, your boyfriend may not appreciate you having done this. Don't bring it up again, it's not your mission in life to see that your boyfriend's father gets diagnosed and treated.