Is there anyone out there who has lost a young child? Today is my baby Matthew's birthday......?

He only lived 11 hours after dying of an infection the doctors should have tested for and didn't. He would be 6 years old today and going into first grade. A big boy. I have accepted his death.....but am feeling a little down today.....wondering about what if's......what would he be like.....what he would look like etc. ......usually I am pretty good about it and I try to look at if from the positive perspective but I don't know...this year I am really sad (it's raining too so that doesn't help).

I have been trying to count my blessings all day - that I have 2 healthy happy children here with me to enjoy and love and take care of, but I still miss him so much.

Just need to hear some positive reinforcement I guess....it's like a bad movie playing over and over and over again in my head.

You have all brought tears to my eyes with your thoughtfulness.....thank you so much. Thank you for the phone numbers for the support groups....and Laurie, I always look for signs....just a crummy day today...like God's crying with me (I had a stone made I was going to place in our memory garden with balloons but it's pouring.....)
Thanks for the vibes....I am catching them. It's people like you that make the world a brighter place. :)

I would like to thank you first for your answer about my Mother illness and death.It's so kind of you.I am sorry for the loss.I have also lost my sister years ago and I was really sad to lose her.It was only pain and sorrow.My mother is very ill and I can see her dying softly every day.It's so sad.My elder sister and brothers cry most of the time.Me too...It's very hard.Death is a gift as you said and I Iove that.I do believe that we all will die one day.I believe that we will travel back to where we come from one day .Only God keeps alive.I do beleive also that you child is now playing with angels in heaven.So do my sister and all kind people who are just waitting for us to follow them...God belss them all...

I am so sorry for your loss. I feel really sad for how you must be feeling.

I found an organization called Share: Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support, Inc. Their website says, "If you need someone to talk to, call 1-800-821-6819." There are also weekly on-line chats. I have included the web address below if you want to find out more about them.

I hope you choose to call. It must be a very difficult time, and talking to someone who understands will surely be helpful to you. I sincerely wish you the best.

http://www.nationalshareoffice.com/resou...
http://www.nationalshareoffice.com/index...

I am so sorry for your loss. time might help the healing, I cant imagine what you have to go through daily. Trust in God.

yeah that sucks i'm sorry to hear that.....maybe try to spend time and do something with the other kids since its raining

I am so sorry for your loss. maybe you could look around for a sign from him. a rainbow, or a pretty flower that seems out of place.
Are you close enough to visit his Grave? maybe bringing him a 'transformer toy ' (or some other appropriate bigboy gift) for his birthday would make you feel better?

Or better yet. Bring it to an orphanage in his Name. maybe?

whatever you end up doing,I hope you are able to find some solice
i'm sending you good vibes. i hope you 'catch' them .


Peace,
~Laurie

I am sorry about your loss. This is the most painful experience a parent will ever have to go through. The loss of a child. I do not think the pain ever goes away completely, especially around the Birthday and holidays.
my child is named Matthew and his Birthday is soon. That is the greatest fear i have.....Losing him forever.
you do have two healthy, beautiful children. let them be the pillar of your hope, and cherish every moment they are with you.
the child lived briefly, be thankful of the time you had with him, and remember he is not suffering and happy.

Its so hard I know both me and my sister lost a child to premature labor and it hurts like hell my little girl would have been 12 years old on the 21 Jan, I miss her, even though I never really knew her the pain is still there. a year ago my sister lost her baby boy the same amount of weeks and it brought it all back to me. I think it would be good if you got some therapy even if you have already had some it seems you could do with a little more. know your not the only person that feels like this, know that your not alone. I wish no one had to loss a child but it seems all to many of us do. my heart goes out to you. take care

death is like a rainstorm. slow and depressing. but, the sun ALWAYS comes out. giving hope. I'm sorry about your loss. remember, when all seems lost, hope is still their.

I lost my wife in 1999 at 36 years old. Not quite the same but my heart is with you. Maybe this will give you a smile, http://www.dcourier.com/main.asp?Section...